Dear Gossips,

At the end of last year, January 17, 2017 was marked on the gossip calendar as a potentially big day. A World War Brange court hearing was scheduled for that day. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie ended up agreeing to use a private judge going forward in their divorce and custody battle however so January 17 came and went without any Brange drama. Which was a good move, for obvious reasons and for feng shui reasons. Brad and Angelina are both Rabbits. And Rabbits are strongly advised to minimise conflict during the Year of the Rooster.

As I’ve repeatedly noted, luck will rise and luck will fall. And it’s how we manage our luck in its low phases that will determine how much we can enjoy it when it surges. For Rabbits, the Year of the Rooster is not go time. Instead it’s a good time to put things on pause. Caution is key. There are no lucky stars on the Rabbit’s side this year. Instead, there are two dark stars up your ass, getting in your way. The Chinese Squawking Chicken says it’s best for Rabbits then to put their heads down and avoid risk as much as possible. Choose observation over attack. It is best though to not take any action, not take on any major decisions, if you can help it. If you find yourself in a situation where you must take action, consider every issue from every single angle. Thoroughly examine all your options.

1951 Rabbits could see some financial reward but relationships might be compromised and your emotions may cost you more than you end up gaining. Be good to your body.

1963 Rabbits might find that they have to work a lot harder than they have in the past to get the same results, expending a lot more energy. So you must be mindful of your health.

1975 Rabbits will be very busy this year and should be careful not to overextend. Take time to rest and relax and manage energy efficiently.

1987 Rabbits might enjoy creative inspiration this year but don’t get too aggressive with your ideas. Acting on impulse is not recommended as things could change unexpectedly and you might suffer for your spontaneity. Be cautious.

1999 Rabbits are advised to celebrate their birthdays in a big way. One major celebration could block 3 disasters.

All Rabbits should be mindful of infidelity. Cheating this year could carry extra consequence. Do not reach and be vigilant against temptation. If love is lost, let it go. Do not waste any precious luck you might have to push for what is not yours.

It is also recommended for all Rabbits to watch their health during the Year of the Rooster. Rabbits are strongly encouraged to get a medical checkup with blood work after February 4th, 2017.

For Rabbits born between March 5 and April 3, be extra careful in March, April, and September of this year. There’s an injury alert. Stay close to home if you can, no travelling. And pay close attention when you’re in the car. Smart driving, always, but especially this year. 

In May and June, Rabbits should also be on alert for family members. In September and October, refrain from making important decisions. These two months could be rocky, filled with errors. Nothing will come easy.

Rabbits should not be lending money during the Year of the Rooster. It is very bad luck for you to lend money. Also do not disturb the foundation of your home. Like don’t go changing the flooring. If you want to replace the carpet in the basement, or anywhere in the house, wait another 12 months. No major home improvement plans. Your home is your base. It is the source of your stability. This is not the year to mess around with that.

Your spirituality will help you this year. Connect with your faith, if you are religious. Be charitable, volunteer, practise kindness, and try to exercise more. Make health a priority and get a lot of rest. And do not be discouraged, Rabbits. It is unrealistic to expect fireworks and awesomeness all the time. And this forecast doesn’t mean that the entire year will be full of f-cksh-t and gloom. It’s merely a heads up so that you will be prepared just in case. My ma the Squawking Chicken always says, no one needs to be “ready” for happiness, but we’d all be better off if we could protect ourselves in the storm. Feng Shui and good luck does not reward the reckless. Remember, more often than not, it’s the way we hold it down during back luck that paves the way for the arrival of good luck. Think of this year as a harvest. You’re hunkering down, putting things away, and waiting for a big bloom later on.

Tomorrow: Tiger

Yours in gossip,

Lainey