Whenever I see photos of Miranda Kerr or Orlando Bloom with their son, Flynn, he looks so happy. And he’s absolutely adorable and chunky and I’d like very much to squish him.
But no kid is an angel 24/7. And I feel Miranda’s stress just looking at these pictures.
When she was getting him ready for the walk, he was probably a little squeamish getting into the stroller. But she has a child-free friend with her so they probably planned to get together and you can’t bail on that because your kid is fussing - that’s a d-ck move.
Flynn is not having any of it. He wants out of the stroller so bad and he’s making it known. First thing she does is check the straps (so he doesn’t launch himself out of it), then she covers him with the hood. I do this too; it’s like we wish it was a soundproof barrier. If that doesn’t help I reach for the soother (yes, I live and die by that thing – judge away).
Then the friend (in cute green jeans), who thinks you have the happiest baby in the world, says “What’s wrong?” And you think to yourself, I have no f-cking clue. But there’s a list of acceptable excuses: he’s teething/not feeling well/hungry/wet diaper. I’m not sure if Flynn is walking but if not probably close to it, so he really might just want to get out and test his skills.
Please, if you are the friend, don’t ask what’s wrong. We really don’t know. Just offer to hold something.
Miranda is pushing the Baby Jogger City Mini stroller. Don’t you know Baby Jogger City Mini? It’s taken over as the It stroller. Bugaboo is out, Baby Jogger is in. Strollers are like designer bags. There’s a season for each one. And cost about the same, too.
I’m not being facetious; it’s a playground status symbol and it’s no coincidence that so many celebrities end up with the same one. Baby Jogger fans include Julia Roberts, Salma Hayek, Jennifer Garner, Halle Berry, Natalie Portman and Naomi Watts (and that’s just the movie star list).
(Lainey: am also attaching new shots of Miranda and Orlando together holding hands in New York as many of you have emailed about them, wondering if there might be a situation between them since they’ve not been photographed together in a while. We can conclude now that they’re fine, right?)