Dear Gossips,

It’s official. Mariah’s World is official.

I posted about this last week – Mimi is shooting a reality show (even though she told the New York Times that “I refuse to call it a reality show”) for E! that will, hopefully, air this summer that follows her during her European tour and will document her behind-the-scenes planning her wedding.

There will be 8 episodes. Each episode is ONE HOUR. That’s 60 minutes of Mimi being Mimi. And what does that look like? Well, you’ve seen her Cribs. So…what the f-ck do you think? This is going to change our lives. I know it will change my life. I know I will be transformed, and if you have any doubt about that, pay attention to the small details provided in that NYT piece. It was 5pm. She’d just woken up. And if she wakes up on a day that happens to be the day BEFORE she has to perform, you won’t be talking to her at all because she doesn’t speak. You’re just supposed to watch her gesticulate or write things down …but that takes energy and actually moving of the limbs so, basically, read her mind. Please, can you just picture that? A team of assistants and bodyguards not only carrying her around from room to room but having to anticipate her silent needs? I’m actually changed already and it hasn’t even happened yet.

Mimi is quick to stress though that Mariah’s World will not include Dembabies or her fiancé, James Packer, because “he’s a legit businessman. It’s not really his thing to be, like, traipsing all over Europe and hanging out with my crew and dancers and singers”. My girl knows who’s camera friendly and who’s not. As for the children, they’re not invited because she doesn’t want to exploit them. Translation: kids are spotlight-stealers, and the Butterfly doesn’t share.

Last night our Elusive Chanteuse opened her tour in Glasgow. At one point she started complaining that the fans weren’t turned up high enough. Then she told the audience that she doesn’t use sparkly microphones anymore because she started it and everyone else is doing it now. Not surprisingly she was lifted across the stage at one point on a couch. And…what’s this? Is our Mimi actually attempting choreography?!?

Yours in gossip,


PS. My avoidance of Duana continues. Duana used to write for Degrassi. And this happened last night.

Who can work in these conditions?!?