Keith will be a Kidman

Lainey Posted by Lainey at June 19, 2006 12:00:00 June 19, 2006 12:00:00
Nicole & Keith confirmed through her publicist and People Magazine today that they have indeed returned to Australia to get married. It will apparently be a Catholic ceremony for friends and close family only, including billionaires and other highly influential non relatives because …well…what good is marrying up if you can’t make use of your wife’s contacts right away? Anyway, as you would expect, local and international pappies have descended upon Sydney, eager to capture every pre and post moment of the worst kept wedding secret in showbiz. And I hate to beat a dead horse here gossips, but for someone who craves privacy so much, don’t you find it odd that the entire world knew exactly where and when she was getting married well in advance and while we’re at it, how many celebrities, even the most hardcore famewhores, actually ANNOUNCE that they’re tying the knot??? Every detail of this extravaGONZA has been made public! And you can read all about it here (thanks to Lorraine for the link!), just one of several Australian dailies that has “coincidentally” been able to report on everything Nicole and Keith. You will note the conspicuous mention in the article that he won’t be drinking on his stag night because he’s off the sauce these days – a comment that clearly stinks of strategic press placement especially since we all know, if you’ve been reading my column that is, that everyone in Nashville has a much different story to sing about Keith’s alcohol free zone. Still, I do have to admire Nicole’s gamely efforts at convincing us that’s she’s found real love. Maybe if her face actually moved, I’d be more inclined to believe her. Finally…while we’re on the subject of conspiracy theories: One of my readers sent me an email the other day describing what she had heard through the E!Online message board… that the Kidman relationship was worth $30 million for Keith, that he was expected to be her “public escort”, that ultra discreet infidelity would be allowed but that Nicole would not be publicly Poshed (translation: HUMILIATED a la Rebecca Loos), and something about his film career that I was too tired to memorise. All theories we’ve heard before. For what it’s worth, I’ve never been given dollar figures from any of my sources about their alleged arrangement which means I cannot vouch for the validity of the aforementioned report. What I can tell you is that there are not too many people who believe this thing is legit and there is a certain irony in that, isn’t there? How two people can go their separate ways after almost 10 years of marriage and STILL be living the same life? SOOO fascinating. And this, my friends, is precisely why I love Hollywood. Oh - and one more thing…take a look at Nicole taken today, her birthday. Suddenly that contract doesn"t seem like such a bad idea, does it?

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