The Daily Frozen: Nicole Kidman

Lainey Posted by Lainey at May 9, 2006 12:00:00 May 9, 2006 12:00:00
It"s Defcon 1 y"all. Someone, anyone…please wean Nic off the botox. Because this photo of her on the cover of Ladies" Home Journal seriously scared the Chinese out of me. I"m sure you"ve all heard about the interview inside. How she still loves Tom, how wonderful he was, how devastated she was by their divorce, nothing about Keith, and nothing about a planned wedding. As you would expect, message boards are now buzzing about the significance of this article. Is it true? Has Keith ditched her? Has she ditched him? From what I"ve heard, no and no. It"s not over. It"s definitely strained and he"s been spending some eyebrow raising time with a tasty brunette when the Freeze is away, but they are still very much together. As I mentioned before, however, no one in Keith"s camp is particularly supportive of their... um…arranged relations. According to my sources, Keith continues to battle those fame vs. happiness devils on either shoulder. So until he makes a decision, things are status quo for now. And to answer all of you who email me regularly, asking why a woman like Nicole would settle for a relationship like this? Why does Pam Anderson keep increasing the size of her tits? Why is Paris Hilton still famous? Why does Jennifer Love Hewitt still have a job? Why is Tori Spelling so ugly??? Why ask why? Nicole Kidman was married for NINE YEARS to the Gay Midget Dwarf. Do you really want to apply your own normal set of universal values to this situation? She"s weird. She has her own agenda. She"s probably being monitored by the Church. She"s destroying her face. And she"s fighting 40. There"s no logic here, gossips. Just go with the smutty flow. Because attempting to "understand" celebrities will make you as crazy as Cruise. And I"m sure you don"t want to go there.

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