It’s been a long, long time. And he owes Mark Ruffalo. Mark is directing a new film called Sympathy for Delicious and because he’s the sweetest guy ever has charitably offered Orlando Bloom a part. But can Orly keep up?

Delicious also stars the underrated Laura Linney who, obviously, can act circles around Orly’s pretty (but useless) little ass. Like, watching him sometimes is almost as embarrassing as reality tv. Have you seen Elizabethtown? Cameron Crowe, what were you thinking?

Thanks to Mark Ruffalo though Orly and his three whiskers have a chance to lift the curse of the Pirates. The money is one thing but getting stuck in teenybopper fangirl limbo is entirely another. Could be the fate of Robert Pattinson…

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