Dear Gossips,

As we’ve seen, Beyoncé knows how to hold back, make us miss her. You know who doesn’t know how – or want – to hold back and make you (not me) miss him?

The Kardashian of Droids, BB-8. Not a week goes by without BB-8 meeting a dignitary or turning out on a talk show. Or releasing a video. This time with Poe Dameron, Oscar Isaac, I SAW HIM FIRST. It’s for a good cause. It’s the latest installment of Star Wars: Force For Change, in support of UNICEF Kid Power. So it’s philanthropy. It’s giving back to the community. Watch BB-8’s reaction though when he finds out what the prize pack is. Naturally (because he’s a famewhore!) his first thought is for himself, like whether or not that means he’s losing on camera time.

As IF the new first star of Star Wars would ever be benched. As IF they would ever reduce his precious screen time. We all had a hand in creating Justin Bieber. And now you all have a hand in creating BB-8. I hope you’re happy.

Yours in gossip,