So Justin Bieber went clubbing in Panama. And when he was leaving the club, he took 10 women home with him. One of those women was a prostitute. She’s now telling her story to the local papers. According to her, this is what happened:

She and JB smoked some pot. Then this:

“He asked me in English if I wanted all of his semen, but I don't understand English. My friend was translating.”

Wanted all of his semem = Can I come all over you?

Which he did. After they f-cked for an hour. In all the positions. And when he was done having all the sex with her, he finished on her chest.

Then he paid her $500 and dropped her off.

Do you believe this story? Do I believe this story? No. But not because I don’t believe that JB can’t make it an hour and come but because I don’t believe that JB has to PAY to go for an hour and come.

We play this game all the time.

“Picture Him On Top Of You”

The reason we can play this game is because people have sex with hideous sh-t ALL THE TIME. Justin Bieber may be ridiculous and annoying and all kinds of negative adjectives. But he’s a celebrity. I promise you, he gets offers nonstop, every day, in every combination, family or otherwise – FOR FREE.

You don’t believe me? Google Harvey Weinstein.

Would you rather…

Justin Bieber or Harvey Weinstein?