Paris Hilton: the virus contained

Lainey Posted by Lainey at August 30, 2006 12:00:00 August 30, 2006 12:00:00
Stars might be blind but they"re certainly not deaf. Page Six gleefully reported Tuesday morning that Paris"s debut release sold a rather underwhelming 76,000 copies last week, coming in under not only Christina Aguilera (to be expected) but also Danity Kane. Who"s Danity Kane??? Exactly. And if you"re not 16 and addicted to MTV, chances are your awareness of Danity Kane is limited to none. So given Paris"s prolific notoriety and the worldwide blowjob she went on last week to promote her disc, can this be considered a major, major flop? Well…not according to her people. According to her people, their expectations were extremely modest, considering it"s her first endeavour and in comparison to other releases last week, they"re bucking up and saying it"s actually not that bad. But still…it is a small mercy, isn"t it? Because although Paris Hilton"s Hollywood Ebola may never be eradicated, it definitely CAN be contained. After all, even viruses have their limits, their infection-free zones, and it would appear that for Paris, music is her Waterloo. Which only means she"ll have to satisfy herself with whoring her wares everywhere else, especially on the personal appearance front. Up to a million dollars just to show up and blink her wonky eye? I"m tellling you, gossips…she will never, ever die. She will fester and rot but she will live forever. Goddess help us all. Source

Previous Article Next Article