Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel just moments ago were eating at Eggstacy in Yorkville in Toronto. Four of my girlfriends were there. No…let me clarify. Four of my girlfriends busted their asses to get there when they heard. I am embarrassed for them so I will not name names. But they know what they did.

Justin is, according to all 4 of them, total quiveration. Even M, who is not a squealy girl, had to gush at me over the phone about his arms. They are manly and they are cut. “Elaine, in person he is no Pipsqueak”. While she’s saying this she’s struggling to breathe. I need new friends. She also told me I’d love the way he wears his jeans. OK.

Then L gets on the phone to tell me about the Shelf Ass. The Shelf Ass is tall. According to L she is gorgeous in person. No make up, absolutely stunning. And nice. Of course L thinks she’s nice because Jessica Biel had to stop her and ask about her coat:

Excuse me… Hi! I just want to ask you – where did you get your coat? I love it!

Shelf Ass said goodbye, left, and L spit out her water.

For the record, L got her coat at Zara.

After JT and Jess left, they called me in hysterics.

Please note – these are four women over 25 who WORK IN ENTERTAINMENT. Between them, they have seen and interviewed everyone in Hollywood. They are not celebrity neophytes. They have been to the Grammys, the Oscars, they have exchanged hot eye contact with Lenny Kravitz and Chris Martin and Colin Farrell. And now they’re losing their sh-t over Pip’n’Ass.

Justin Timberlake is indeed a starmaker. No wonder she suddenly has a career. No wonder his ego is out of control.