Prince Harry was at the premiere of The Dark Knight Rises tonight. I’m sure he didn’t mind putting on his dinner jacket for this occasion. Does he eat popcorn with his dinner jacket on? Does he wipe his hand on his pants?

I don’t think I could focus on a movie if Harry was in the theatre. I’d be too busy observing these kinds of mannerisms. In high tension moments, does he brace? Does he wince? What parts would he laugh at? Does he shift uncomfortably when he’s holding his pee? TDKR is almost 3 hours long. I will have to go at least twice. Look, if you properly hydrate, the way they always recommend, how can you be expected to sit through a 3 hour movie without emptying? This is another reason I complain about the length of films these days.