Prince William and Catherine were photographed holding hands on a walk through Holyrood Park the other day looking a little worn out after Zara Phillip’s bender of a wedding. Kate, in particular, seems pretty run down after so many months of non-stop activity. Also, as we all know, the ongoing debate: Face or Body? An aging face, it deflates. Faces are more youthful, better with a little fat. Asses, on the other hand, errm, in Kate’s mind, they’re not. Face or Body?

But I’m so into how proper they are. That they can’t wear their matching jumpers without a collared shirt underneath. Having said that, now you know why some people say they’re super square – if, that is, you weren’t feeling it before.

Square, not square, too thin, not too thin, whatever, it doesn’t change the fact that they love each other, they really do. And that this is a true partnership on every level. And that among that set of rich bitches who were circling to marry him, she may have been the only one who’d be so down with taking a low cost airline flight back home. Indeed, the future king and queen flew Flybe back to Manchester on their way home to Anglesey, Wales. It’s only an hour but there’s no first class, the seats are TIGHT, and, well, when you consider that most B list actors wouldn’t even consider flying coach (or imagine MADONNA ON A FLYBE JET!!!), I’m just saying they’re demonstrating a willingness to modify the standards set by his predecessors and that, you know, one of those titled girls with at least three names, like Margaret Harriett Wandling Mountbattenfordshireton, may not have been so willing. Maybe that’s why they look so exhausted. Anyone would be riding one of those planes, which, while we’re on the subject, I try to avoid at all times. SO f-cking uncomfortable. And they seem to be the only available options to Mexico ... and this is why I don’t go to Mexico.

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