When I watch the Oscars, I really care about who wins. Like, not just to see the dress up on stage, but to know which performance or film was chosen by the Academy. At the Oscars, the results matter.

And why do you watch the Golden Globes?

Don’t say the results. Globe results are totally irrelevant. Even a Glee fan will tell you that.

No, we watch the Globes for the Movie Star and TV Star mingling, to see who gets drunk by the opening animation, to see who they talk to during commercial breaks when they all get up out of their seats, and who they DON’T talk to during commercial breaks. And now, we also watch for Ricky Gervais.

After all that f-cking drama and Harvey Weinstein’s empty threats about blacklisting, Ricky Gervais is back. For ratings. Always for ratings. Who cares if it’s mean if he delivers the ratings?

But was it really that mean?


You think these people, who operate in a town where casting couching and backstabbing and fake imaging and bearding and cover upping, you think these people were actually offended by Ricky Gervais?


For the benefit of the MiniVan Majority, they pretended to be offended. Secretly though, please, they were thrilled as long as it wasn’t them. And for almost everyone in that room, it wasn’t them. In other words, everyone had a great time, they’re just not allowed to admit it.

As for this year, well, Ricky has some targets: Brange will be back (if they found a way to nominate The f-cking Tourist last year, they won’t have a hard time nominating Tree of Life or Moneyball), George is there with Stacy Keibler, a former wrestler, Leonardo DiCaprio’s flies private and advocates for the environment, any number of fart and poo jokes thanks to Bridesmaids, and, the possible presenting presence of Tom Cruise.


If you love Gossip, you’re all over it.

Attached - Ricky at ITV studios this morning in London.