I’m gloating. Click away if you can’t handle it. Because as I first reported exclusively back in June, Robert Pattinson covers the December issue of Vanity Fair, featured in a series of beautiful photos that explains the mass jizzing…

They’ve been jizzing all weekend over these shots. He is so pretty. And so photogenic. And his mouth isn’t open. And his mothering hips are nicely obscured. And I refuse to open any emails from Laura today because I know she’ll just be panting all over my Blackberry with some graphic explanation about how he came to her in her dream last night and since I’m seeing her next week in Toronto and my desk is next to hers, I choose not to endure it while I can.

Is he gorgeous? Of course he’s gorgeous. But still…an amoeba. I’m not sure he’d confidently rock a headboard. Chill Twi-Hards…we’re allowed to choose our own quiver, aren’t we?

To read a preview of the article and see more photos click here. Vanity Fair is smart. They’ve promised a sh-tload of outtakes from the photo shoot to be slowly released over a few days to keep the horny bitches coming back.

But the absolute BEST…

The comments.

After you’ve finished moisting yourself over the images, make sure to go back to the interview page and scroll through the Twi-Hard comments here. Not surprisingly, they start fighting each other again. And criticising the magazine. And yelling about injustices. And crying about this. And fretting about that.

It’s like FIVE PAGES of hatemail and The Swears. Enjoy.