Pink, lavender, whatever... it’s ... objectionable. Like really, really insulting. I mean, that colour, it should be outlawed, with few exceptions, for people over 6, 7 max. And those weird tit cups. And that black bow. And that goddamn feather ruffle skirt. Anna please put a ban on this sh-t. For at least 5 years. Because not only does Penelope Cruz keep doing it over and over again but every other broad wants to do it over and over again and now they’re making it lavender and cotton candy and it’s not exactly the best example of originality. Gross.

As for Carey Mulligan – obviously she was much less of a problem. Was all over it at first. But then it seemed like it was the same old Carey. Really uninspired. And too casual with the tights. Afternoon tea? Totally. Met Gala? She held back. Which is better than going too hard, sure, but I think she held back too much.

Photos from and Stephen Lovekin/Larry Busacca/