The Beckhams were invited to the Wedding of the Century. Naturally, the British tabloids have been quick to hop on their acquaintanceship-relationship, eager to manufacture some kind of bullsh-t headline that might move a few extra thousand copies or generate a few extra page views. As a traffic whore myself, I’m down with generating page views, but putting a story out there about the Future King of England being the godfather to the Beckhams incoming girl-child seems a bit of a stretch, non?

According to a source for The Mirror:

“They are always texting each other. People haven’t realised quite how close they are. Despite their different backgrounds, they got along really well during the (World Cup) bid. And seeing as William and Kate will be in LA, it’s highly likely they will visit the baby. David may even ask William to be a godparent... you never know.”

I’m no expert on royal protocol and upyourass procedurals but I’m pretty sure, you can’t just ask Prince William, second in line to the throne, and, some say, the preferred heir, to be your kid’s godfather over a f-cking beer after the hockey game. I would imagine that letters would have to be written. At least ONE letter would have to written. And people would have to approve. Maybe even the Queen herself.

I mean, there’s a goddamn “how-to” when it comes to meeting her in a line-up: where to look, what to do with your hand, what to say, when to say it, the volume at which you say it – and that’s for a 30 second encounter.

Godfathering your kid off to a Prince can’t be that simple, is all I’m saying.

Anyway, now that Will & Kate are the most popular couple in the world, and Pippa Watch coming in right behind them, photo agencies are re-releasing old shots of the Prince & Princess and her sister. I like looking at these pictures and studying what was then in the context of what is now.

These were taken in Ibiza in 2006. Will joined the Middletons on a family holiday. He seems relaxed and comfortable with them, a testament to how he must have trusted them, and now they’ve become his in-laws. Both Kate and Pippa are in white swimsuits. Kinda like wedding day. Many of you have emailed to ask my thoughts about Pippa wearing white and whether or not that was offside. Duana wasn’t thrilled with it. I loved the look of it. So clean and uniform and crisp. I think everyone should do it. My cousin did it at her wedding. She asked everyone, all guests, to wear white. The album is spectacular. And, obviously, Pippa would not have done it if Kate hadn’t approved. It probably wasn’t so much an approval actually, given Kate’s attention to detail over the entire affair, as an insistence. I would guess that it was Kate herself who wanted Pippa in white. Look at the footage. If you ask me, it was the right call.

That’s Pippa flipping off the boat.

That’s also Kate resting her head on Will’s thigh. And in one of the images his hand is on her stomach OHMYGODTHESCANDAL!

Now that they’re married, is it wrong to be seen in bikini in her current position? You never know with these people.

Photos from