Sandra Bullock covers the new issue of VOGUE. You know Sandy’s one of my favourites but I can’t say this is the most memorable interview ever. By design. Sandy’s not all that gossipy, you know? There was a Big Gossip Story that happened to her, sure, but Sandy in her own space? She actively avoids it. Julia Roberts without the drama. It doesn’t make her not interesting, it just makes written pieces about her not that interesting. Sandy’s a lot better in person than she is in print. In print she has nothing to give away. Click here to read the article. She’s solid, that Sandy. She deserves your love. There’s just not a lot here for me to write about. So I decided that we’d review all her past VOGUEs instead. Because I don’t love this year’s edition. It’s the hair. Specifically it’s the squiggle of hair at the nape of the neck. If not for that one piece, the hair would be OK. But I can’t get with that squiggle. Sorry.

Should we start from the beginning? The first time Sandy covered VOGUE it was 1998. It was around when Gwyneth Paltrow won her Oscar for Shakespeare In Love. They all kinda looked like this back then. Late 90s styling, late 90s skin tones. I swear Winona Ryder shot a cover for a magazine like this too.

In 2003, Sandy was sun-kissed and, again, of the time. Like Jennifer Aniston did probably 8 of these covers.

2005 sucked. Nothing remarkable about the shot. And she probably hated posing like that. I’d be surprised if this wasn’t Mario Testino.

I have no idea who this person is in 2006. Does it look like Sandra Bullock? Or is it Laura San Giacomo?  This one, for sure, was Testino.

So it’s been almost 9 years since Sandy and VOGUE came together. It’s been 5 times total. And not once has Anna Wintour let her truly, truly smile.