SJP and Dandy Pants at an off-Broadway opening last night. As you can see, she’s wearing the most unflattering combination. Michelle (who hates sateen) does not approve. It’s that shiny material again. Can make even Sarah Jessica Parker look … not thin.

Also don’t understand about the jacket. A gorgeous jacket. All over the big pointy chic shoulders. But she chose to awkwardly and intentionally wear it around her shoulders all night. Just in case you wanted to make an excuse for her – yeah, she left her house like that. It was on purpose. Why? Not sure.

But I know what you’ll be suggesting…

I don’t but you do – you all love the boring BumpWatch and so you’re probably now speculating: is she pregnant again?

Don’t care.

But since you do, am attaching photos taken over 3 weeks ago wearing a fitted dress on set of her new movie for you to analyse every angle.

Photos from and Jackson Lee/Susana York/