I cut myself. Nobody around me knows. I've started a few years ago in high school, and haven’t been able to stop since. I am now a sophomore in college, living by myself, which makes it harder to stop. I’ve tried many times to tell my parents and close ones, but I’m too ashamed. I seem so ok on the outside that it makes it so much harder to tell anyone I know.  It’s my go to move the second I’m by myself. I want to stop, but don’t know how to.  X

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Thank you for trusting me enough to write this email – I can’t imagine how hard it was to get the courage to do it, but I’m hoping you feel a small amount of relief that you’ve finally let someone in on this secret.

Now let’s talk about relief for a moment because this is why people self-mutilate – it’s a way to release emotional pain when it feels like you’re suffocating in your own self-hate. But what you need to realize is the cutting is just an evil disguise for relief, because X, if you want a true and real sense of relief then you need to express that pain through words.

I don’t know what you’re going through specifically right now but  whether it’s rage, depression, shame, or all of the above you need to figure out why you’re turning the pain so dangerously inwards. In order to do that you’re going to need to get help, which means you’re going to have to confide in someone.  X, that someone is your parents.

I know you’re embarrassed, I know you fear that they’ll be disappointed, but X, if you can find the same strength and courage it took to write me, then I have a feeling you’ll be surprised at all the support and love that comes pouring in. Listen, there’s nothing wrong with asking or needing help – we all need emotional tune-ups from time to time, and X, I think you and I both know you’re at a very crucial point in your life. So please, reach out and get some help because it’s time for your wounds to heal both inside and out. 

Thank you again for writing in and please keep me posted! xx