Hi Sasha, I moved out to a new town about 1.5 years ago and have since met some really amazing friends out here.  One of the guys I met has become one of my closest friends.  Somehow over getting to know him, I've also totally fallen for him.  Like big time.  I haven't told any of my friends because I don't want it to be awkward with any of us.  I absolutely don't want to lose his friendship, or any of the others as they were friends first either.  I've effectively been able to shut the feelings down pretty well, but they still pop up at the worst times.  My dilemma is whether or not to talk to him about them.  I don't want to risk my friendship with him or anyone else.  It's too tough to make new friends and the ones I have I absolutely adore.

One other issue - he has a boyfriend and to clarify I'm gay.  I also totally respect the fact he has a bf and there will be nothing done on my part while they're still together.  That's not how I would ever roll.  What should I do? Thanks so much!


Well, if you’re not one of those people who get in the way of a relationship then DOT DOT DOT:
I mean, there’s your answer and my answer.

I know your passionate heart wants to punch me in the face, but the dude has another dude which means he can’t be your dude…..at least right now. T, this is coming from someone (me) who has been in your exact situation. In university I was madly deeply in love with this total babe, but he had a chick, so I had no choice but to wait that sh-t out. I waited almost two years, but my turn eventually came up. Now, I don’t know how old you are, but I have a feeling you’re a young tyke, which means the odds are in your favor that at some point they’ll call it quits. Not now, not tomorrow, but when that time comes, then you have my blessing to seize the f-ck out of that moment. Until then, put a barbwire around the idea.

Of course, that doesn’t mean until then life has to be doom and gloom. F-ck that noise. Get out there and get yourself busy with a cornucopia of dicks. Trust me, you can still have a butt load of fun.

Thanks for writing in and keep all your LIFE + STYLE questions coming in to me at [email protected].

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