Hi Sasha, I am 25 years old, happily married with a beautiful baby girl. I work for a successful nationwide company and not to sound like I’m bragging (maybe just a little bit), but for my age I’m pretty successful and make a good salary. I work, take care of my husband and my daughter, cook every day, take care of all our finances, help my husband with his business and keep my house crazy clean. I’ve worked very hard to be where I am and I feel good about myself – sometimes.
Here comes my issue – my mother-in-law. If there’s one person who can make me feel like I’m complete dog sh-t, it’s her! It wasn’t until we got engaged and then married that she turned into an evil wench. It’s almost as if as long as I was just his girlfriend I was okay. When we got engaged she started talking about me behind my back saying how I wasn’t good enough for her son. She would make, and still makes, snide little comments here and there about my appearance, my upbringing, my job, my job as a mother, my nationality (We’re both Hispanic, just different nationalities). I’ve tried my best to ignore it and be polite, but it just keeps getting worse. After we got married its just become unbearable. I tell my husband and he says he will confront her (since she never makes these comments in front of him) but I tell him not to because I feel it will only make the situation for her to think I’m a petty whiny little b-tch.
I don’t understand what her problem with me is. She claims I’ve accomplished nothing and have nothing to offer her son. She constantly brings up my husbands ex and goes on about how much my husband adored her and how beautiful and great she is (she cheated on my husband – he found her in their bed with her BOSS. I mean, really?). She nit-picks everything from my outfits, my hair, even to the color on my nails! After I had my daughter, I lost my pregnancy weight 5 weeks (5!) after she was born. What does she say to me? “You’d look better if you weren’t so fat”.
I honestly don’t know what to do anymore. Am I being crazy sensitive or am I right to feel like she’s attacking me. How do I deal with this lady? Help! V.
V, if you read my post from a few weeks ago you’d know that your mother-in-law falls into the category of cow c-nt. I’m so sorry that you have to be subjected to such a huge amount of bullsh-t, she sounds like a real asshole.
So, look, I’m not going to lie, this is a tough one and it’s probably not going to be remedied quickly; regardless, this woman needs a massive wake-up call but V, you’re not the one to do that. For whatever reason she has her hate on for you and if you take her on yourself, by yourself, she’ll have you just where she wants you. Your mother-in-law has a master plan and it’s to break your ass down, so that maybe, just maybe, it’ll finally get to the point that you can’t take her sh-t anymore and you leave her son. We obviously can’t let that happen, so you need to sit down and have a talk, but that talk is with your husband. He’s the only one here who will make a difference because as we all know anything you do or say is not right in her eyes. She will take your words as a personal attack, further feeding the fire, so it has to be all on your man.
It’s great to hear that he’s offered to do that, so now you need to let him. However he wants to approach this is up to him, but the message needs to be clear: back the f-ck off my wife. Ground rules and boundaries need to be set and if he has to drop some ultimatums, so be it.
I really wish you the best of luck with his and I hope you guys can patch up your differences and begin to be civil to each other. xx