Hi Sasha I'm 29 yrs old, single, live in an apt alone. I'm very independent woman... Really happy with being single right now, I have a great group of family and friends... Decided that I don't want have any children, when people ask me; if I ever plan to getting married and have kids someday. I always answer No, With typical responses back you just haven't met the right guy yet, you'll change your mind when you meet Mr. Right.... Granted I like kids, I just personal don't see myself as Mom.... What's the best way to say I don't want children, without getting people all offend??? Thanks S
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People really need to de-jam their heads out of every woman’s vagina. It’s not only one of the most invasive questions, it’s straight up f-cking rude. Who knows if the person you’re asking has suffered miscarriages, or is infertile, or like you S, just doesn’t want to have children. So if you’re a fellow human and you’re guilty of asking these questions, please, for the love of god, shut your pie hole.
Now here’s the deal, S. While the baby question is totally personal, I think we can all agree that your friends aren’t asking to make you feel bad. Plus, as your friends, they should know what’s going on in your life and what you want do with it, and for that reason I don’t think there’s anything wrong with having a discussion about your choices to not have children. It’s nothing to be ashamed of; if they want to ask, then they get to listen.
The bigger issue for me, as I noted at the start, is when perfect strangers roll up and ask what’s up with your uterus. For those people, I think you can meet their boldness head on. My advice is to say “NO” and just let that sh-t hang in dead air. If they feel the awkwardness – good, they should. Now, if they do follow up with the cringe worthy “but it’s so fulfilling” then please ask them to SEE: Oprah, Mother Theresa, and or Lainey Lui. Pretty sure their lives were and are f-cking fulfilled.
S, I wish I could give you the perfect one-liner to stop them all, but as you know society has very strong prejudices about what women ought to do and there will always be people who hold on to outdated views that all women should be mothers. Just know, as I’m sure you do, that you’re no less powerful, accomplished or selfless for your choice.
Thanks for writing in and for all of you out there reading keep your questions coming to [email protected].
