Hi Sasha,

I have a horrible nose. It's big, asymmetrical, my nostrils are huge, I have a severely deviated septum, the cartilage is collapsed on one side...It's a total mess. It was awful growing up with this nose. I've been the butt of jokes since puberty (from both peers and family members).  I'm in a pediatric healthcare related field, and kids always comment on how big my nose is.  It's easily the thing I hate most about myself.

But I've lived with this nose for 35 years, and I'm starting to make my peace with it.  Believe it or not, I've found a husband, have kids, have a good job, and have an all around decent life.

But recently I went to the ENT doctor for an unrelated issue, and he opened up the septoplasty/rhinoplasty can of worms.  I am totally on board with getting my deviated septum fixed, because I basically can't breathe through one side of my nose, and there would be serious medical benefits.  The real question is whether or not I want to combine it with rhinoplasty.  \This doctor pointed out all the awful things about my nose and told me how much of an improvement in my life this surgery would make. I left the appointment and sat in my car crying for about 10 minutes because I felt like such a deformed freak. 

My biggest concerns are that I won't look like myself anymore and my husband, for his part, tells me that he loves my nose and doesn't want me to change it, but he supports me whatever I decide to do. So my question is -- what should I do? 


I'm going to be completely honest here: your nose looks totally a-okay to me. In fact, it didn't draw my attention at all and like, I was really, really looking (P.S.  if you’re wondering, your gmail account has your profile picture right on it). The thing is, that’s just me; I don’t care about sh-t like that, but I do know that people can be judgemental dicks, especially little kids.

I've got to give you major props though, because while I’m sure it hasn't always been easy, you do sound like you've not only come to accept your nose, but you realize that in the scheme of all things, it’s not important at all. You are healthy, you have love, you have a family, a great job and that nose of yours - big or small, symmetrical or not - hasn't held you back from creating a wonderful life for yourself. Right?


So let’s get to the pressing question here – nose job or no nose job? Well, I definitely think you need to get that deviated septum fixed because you know, breathing is mucho importante, but when it comes to f-cking with the overall integrity of your schnoz, I wouldn't mess with it too much. I mean, if they can straighten a bit here, tweak a nostril size to make them look the same, sure; just don’t come back with some Real Housewives looking thing.  

But but but… before you do anything make sure to talk with your surgeon at length about what you want; he/she should also have one of those plastic surgeon simulators so that you can make sure that what you envision going in with is what you come out with. 

Thanks for writing in and keep me posted xx