Written by Sasha

After a random hook-up the other night, I was told post-coital - "I love that you're hairy!" I took it as an insult. I'm lazy, winter's almost over, and I haven't had a chance to "manscape" yet slash it's one of my least favourite things to do and I'm a low maintenance gay. So immediately the day after, I got to my pre-Spring manscaping and it got me thinking, are we (gays and gals), more into a 1) I'm hairy and gonna own it guy; 2) full on waxed/shaved, rub me with body stubble, I wish I was pre-pubescent; or 3) trimmed and in control? I'm torn because I'm somewhere in between all three ... I like that there seems to be a trend towards letting it grow in a bit these days, but I don't wanna turn into a full on bear but I also don't want to look 12 years old (which I do if I'm full on hairless). Plus, I'm lazy and not good at giving myself the trim. Anyway, just curious to get your thoughts for either your guy or guys in general. And summer topless time is -- I'm looking for "manscaping" tools / products / salons in Vancouver to get a "back, sack, crack"! G

‘back, sack and crack’….that might be my new catch phrase – I love a good rhyme so thank you for that.

Now G, I’ve gotta admit I’m not a body hair trend expert because, well, I don’t really go asking people what they do to their muff in the buff (I tried, still not as good as yours). However, when it comes to preference, it obviously varies. I know girls/guys who love their men all Sphynx like, and on the flipside I have friends who love a good ol’ mouthful of shag. Personally I don’t want my man to care too much about his maintenance. Sure, trim and keep that sh-t so it’s not unruly, but if we’re fighting over who gets the razor, um, no thank you.

I also think it depends on what kind of gay you’re boning and if you care enough to impress. If you’re ass up for someone like Lance Bass, then yah, he’ll probably be and want someone well-pruned. But if you’re bagging Tom Cruise (wink), I'm gonna bet he goes for the hairy, burly types. So G, if you’re asking what I think you should do, I say, do *You*. If you feel good looking like a 5 year old boy, go for it, but if you like to grow it out a bit, good times.

Have you heard of Poser? It’s a photography book by the very talented Caitlin Cronenberg (her father is the director David Cronenberg). The book is cover to cover naked shots of people with all sorts of wangs, balls, vaginas and boobs. I can pretend that I looked at each body as an art piece, but of course I didn’t; I perved on it like a horny pre-teen. The weird thing is though, as I kept flipping through, it became less voyeuristic and more comforting. Not what I had planned for.

Here’s the thing, we spend all this time worrying that we’re not perfect, picking apart every last pubic hair, when the reality is everybody looks so goddamn different. Who are we comparing ourselves too? Photo-shopped porn stars? Definitely not real people. The fact is, we all have certain things that turn us off and on, and we’ll never be able to satisfy everyone’s criteria. So I say werrrk what you’ve got in the way you want.

Now, when it comes to tools.

I know there are some products designed specifically for manscaping. For example, click here and here. However, from what I hear, a regular trimmer for your face does virtually the same damn thing.

If you’re looking to remove hair entirely, then waxing is obviously an option. But be warned, you really need to commit, otherwise you’ll get that gross hard stubble, which is pretty unattractive if you ask me. As for a spa in Vancouver the word on the street is Spruce Body Lab is the place to go. And if you want to do some at home waxing check out this Vancouver company for men and women called Parissa – apparently really great! However, if waxing is too progressive try Nair for Men- you can pick it up at any Shoppers in your hood.

Hope this helps! I’ll pass on any other words of wisdom from other readers to you as well!

Sasha, I found the cuuuuuuutest bag online the other day, and much to my eternal disappointment it was sold out. Can you help me find a tan version large-ish/hobo shape, with that worn-in, vaguely hippie yet moderately stylish look, in leather or vegan leather as long as it doesn't look like Walmart quality, and roughly the same price range would make me a very happy girl! I live in Wyoming, which if you don't know has way more antelope and grizzly bears than stores that sell cute, affordable bags, so online shopping is my friend. Oh and I am definitely not afraid of eBay either, but no one is selling this. Thanks!! LT

Lucky you. I just happened to discover a line that I’m excited to share with you. It’s called SAS. I’m not going to lie, the season before – not feeling it – but the Spring Summer collection, yes please! Click their online website and scroll to the bottom and look at SWS1126. Nice, right? Oh and this should make all you tree huggers happy too because the line is 100% vegan. And did I mention – all the bags are crazy affordable!

Another great line out of Vancouver is called Erin Templeton. She has an online store that you can check out. All her bags are from recycled leather and they all have that great worn in look. LT what do you think about this one or this one. Both pretty damn perfect to me. But drop her an email because she has some new designs that don’t seem to be up on her site at the moment.

Ashley Watson is another designer rep’ing Vancity. Check out her site here and take a look at the Heron bag.

And if none of these satisfy your needs - what the f-ck is wrong with you? But fine, just in case click here, here and here for some other options. And check out this one - yes it’s expensive but ohhh it’s good. Is it worthy of eating the instant noodle diet to pay it off? Yes, it should be.

Hi Sasha, with summer quickly approaching, I'm faced with a problem I encounter every year - trying to find a decent pair of shorts. I'm blessed with a butt, hips and thighs that make finding a good pair very difficult. Most of the time I wear dresses but some occasions call for shorts. Do you have any suggestions on brands or styles that are friendly to those with like me? A lot of shorts these days seem to still be super short or board shorts...where are the middle ground?? Thanks! L

I hear you. Shorts are the bane of my existence - trying to find the perfect pair always seems so damn impossible. There are times when I think I just might not be made for shorts. It’s just the cold hard truth, and L, you might have to accept this reality too. But let’s give it one more try and see if any of these looks make an impact.

The key is finding something with a longer hemline as well as something with a less structured fabric. Another thing you want to make sure of is that the shorts have a wider leg opening. The whole point is to avoid pulling fabric over the thigh region and getting that horrible chafe. Let’s get to it.

Jean shorts are the easiest and most causal option. For some reason they never do me wrong, plus they look damn cute with a t-shirt or even a preppy collared shirt tucked in. I say, make your own by cutting up some vintage jeans, but if you want to buy them, then check out these Madewell ones here and here and these Rich and Skinny ones here.

Another flattering option is the silk short. There’s something about the hang of the fabric that just does the trick. I’m also into the pockets in the back.

Linen or linen like fabric also hang well. These are lightweight and have a nice loose silhouette. They would look great with a nautical striped top and some natural colored wedges.

Now, I know I’ve shown love to these J Crew shorts before, and I’m going to again. The boyfriend cut is super forgiving for curvier folk, and I’m a total sucker for the utility green.

And finally if your body type lends itself to a higher waist then I’ve got two suggestions:

First, I love these clover shorts from Dace. The cut as well as the fabric look perfect. They will be my jam this summer.

Next for something a tad dressier - check out these shorts from Aritzia. Again the cut and fabric are stellar.

So there you go! I hope something here makes you excited enough to shave your legs.