Written by Sasha

Last May I needed to have a surgery that required that I have my entire thyroid removed as there were growths all over and through it that were potentially cancerous. Ya, it super sucked and now I am left with a scar right across my neck. I know I should just be counting my blessings but the superficial part of me secretly hates the scar...because it is right there. And not that I am ashamed of it, it just bothers me that when people look at me, that is one of the first things they see. It is extremely hard to hide. During the winter, it’s no problem, I just wear scarves, but the issue is the summer or if I am going out dancing. Or when you go away to on a trip to somewhere tropical (like I am in March). It looks a little weird to be wearing a scarf when it’s +30 outside or when you are dancing at the club. So my problem is actually three-fold:
1. When wearing scarves, what are the different ways you can tie them to get some different looks?
2. What can I wear instead of a scarf to help conceal my scar when its warm out or when scarves aren't appropriate?
3. People have suggest necklaces. My other problem is I have a large chest...what kind can I wear that won't make me look too top heavy a la Jessica Simpson? SL

SL, I’m so happy to hear that you’re healthy – YAY!

I’m also so happy that you’re looking for scarf advice because I’ve just discovered a line I’ve been dying to share with someone. It’s called Scout and Catalogue and if you love some bohemian in your life, then check ‘em out. So good – right?

Now, when it comes to finding the right scarf there are a couple of key factors involved. It needs to be stiff and long - yes, I’m fully aware this sounds like soft porn. First, the fabric can’t be any limp dicked piece of sh*t – it needs to be on the stiffer side, like a linen cotton blend, so that it sits fairly upright on the neck. The next thing to look out for is length. I need mine hella long so I can wrap that sucker around my neck a hundred times if need be – so look for one that’s at least 5 feet.

Moving on to how to wrap and wear them. Lately I’ve been wrapping my scarf up like a neck brace, so everything is tucked into one giant ball. But if that’s not your thing, then just make two goes around your neck and let the ends dangle. Oh and a cool new detail on the S&C scarves this season is they have a leather loop attached, which basically ties it around your neck if you’re unable to figure it out on your own. Now, I do have one pet peeve…please avoid doing the once around leaving the impression your wearing a thick fabric choker - it’s too Alanis for my liking. And I know you’re worried about wearing a scarf in the warmer weather but you really shouldn’t. I wear scarves all year round - especially with tank tops - so I hope you get over that and start rocking them in the summertime. Oh and did you see that picture of Diane Kruger wearing a scarf with her bathing suit on the beach? Just saying…

But obviously you can’t be a scarf wearing weirdo 24/7 so necklaces are a good option as well. Obviously look for something that falls just below your collar bone (or longer) so that you’re not bringing the focus back up to the scar. As for your big fun bags – I don’t think they’re a factor when it comes to jewellery choices, so go balls to the wall with whatever you like. Click here and here and here, oh and here for a few inspirations. But of course stock up at H&M and Top Shop for the cheap sh-t.

One more thing, I know this surgery is really recent so I totally get the insecurity. I’d be the same way too. But I hope soon enough you’ll start to own that scar, because for real, it’s part of your story now and that’s a cool thing. Can you tell I just finished watching an episode of Oprah?


Hi Sasha! I’m getting married in October, and have made it my mission to find the perfect pair of shoes - in my favourite colour - green. I would love to buy a pair of $2,000 shoes, but that's not in the budget, but I could justify something as high as $700 for the PERFECT pair. I've been hunting the interwebs (undoubtedly more than I should be), and anything close to green is always some horrible boring satin shoe, and since I have 9 months to mull over this issue, I don't plan on settling for the a-typical satin wedding shoe. Everything I love only ever comes in black, tan or maybe red. I want something flashy and fun in a 3-4 inch heel. :-) Can you help?? Thank you!! EW
Green? Flashy? Really? I don’t want you to get all bridezilla on my ass so I’m just going to do as you say.

So I’ve been on the search all night and good god, EW you’re right, there is some next level tacky sh-t out there but I’ve found some goodies that I hope you dig.

I’m starting with my favorite pair. These YSL pumps are making me crazy inside. I know they’re a buck more than your budget but if you can spend 700 then I’m willing to bet that you can push it to 800. Plus, these aren’t a one pump, pump – you could get some serious use out of them for years to come. But if that extra hunny is really not possible, then fine, Steve Madden makes a good rip off.

Next, to play up on the fun factor I found these Brian Atwood lime green pumps. Listen, you didn’t specify what type of green and I think they could be damn cute if people got a glimpse of them peeking through your dress. And if you really want to go all out then there’s this crazy option.

Moving on to a more sane choice – this pair isn’t quite as in-your-face green but in my opinion they’d be great if your wedding is going to lean on the more formal side of things. The shoes are just over two bills which will give you some extra dough to frivolously spend elsewhere.

The last pair is another option - I love these ones a lot. I especially like that they’re a strappy sandal because on your wedding day I think you should be showing as much skin as possible. (Lainey – I prefer the first YSLs. Not that it’s any of my goddamn business.)

And if all else fails have you heard of Shoes of Prey? It’s a really cool site that allows you to customize your dream shoes, so make sure to check them out.

So there you have it, EW. I hope I’ve piqued your interest with some of these options I hope you find the perfect pair!

I am a fairly average 28 year old who has had an obsession with shoes as long as I can remember. You know how you can put on the greatest outfit ever, but if the shoes aren’t right then it’s totally off? I have bought countless cute pairs to wear without ever being able to wear them and here’s why; I have extremely wide feet and I’ve never been able wear anything cute other than mary janes and orthopedic looking shoes. Now when I say wide I mean I am a US 6.5 4E. Not W, not WW, but 4E! I blame my mother, she has the same feet. Now don’t get me wrong I love mary janes, but I would kill to be able to wear something with a heel and not 2 sizes too big. I’ve actually been forced to wear flip flops to a wedding because I had no other shoe options available. I try to fool myself into believing that I’ll be able to wear a pair of shoes if I can manage to squeeze my feet in them, but the reality is that it never works out. My feet are either so cramped that I hobble instead of walk or my feet hang over the edge and it looks beyond hideous. I have obsessively scoured the web for options, but I haven’t had any luck yet. I have even tried to find a cross dressing site that would have some options, to no avail. I’ve thought about having shoes custom made, but I know it’s going to be pretty expensive and I am not exactly rolling in the dough. Do you know of ANYONE who makes cute, seriously wide width shoes? mp

Wow, I thought looking for green shoes was bad. I can’t even express how depressing it was trying to find 4 E width shoes. I felt like someone was repeatedly beating my eyes - I mean, you have wide feet not clubbed feet. Seriously people, that was some grim sh-t.

First things first, for anyone who’s looking to start a new venture – DESIGN NICE LOOKING WIDE FEET SHOES for fu-k sake!

I’m going to be straight up, my search came up pretty damn empty, but I was able to find one decent pair. I know they’re not high heels (sorry) but they’re kinda frye-esque and would look cool with a pair of skinny jeans tucked in. Other than that, some blogs recommend a site called torrid.com but they don’t specify if they have 4e width shoes just extra wide shoes. Will that work?

Listen, I know I’ve failed this mission but I wanted to post your question to see if anyone else can help you. So Lainey readers show MP some love and let’s find her some shoes that won’t make her look like an 80 year old man.


Photos from Carlo Allegri/Gettyimages.com