WHY: I like my jeans like I like my underwear – full bottomed.  Sure, I look back on my unhygienic g-string/low rise denim days fondly.  It made sense back then.  My ass was ripe for the pickin’, and frankly I was too busy shot-gunning beer to realize how damn uncomfortable it all was.

These days I like my style to be easy and as comfortable as humanly possible.  This is where these J BRANDs come in.  I really really love them.  It’s like my ass is getting a big bear hug every time I put them on, and that’s very comforting for someone as needy as me.

Everything gets sucked in, butt crack is not an option, I can wear them for 5 days straight without them getting baggy, and somehow I don’t look like Jessica Simpson at a chili cook off.  All I’m asking here is the next time you go through the heinous act of jean shopping, try them on.  If you love them, you’re welcome.  If you hate them, lose my number.