Here are the Spices in London today to announce Viva Forever, a stage production based on their songs. Think Mamma Mia only replace Dancing Queen with Wannabe and Waterloo with Spice Up Your Life and “the story of a beautiful, talented girl and her best friends who get swept up in the obsession of today's TV celebrity culture". Please. The show will open at the Piccadilly Theatre on December 11. Don’t be ridiculous. Of course you want to see it. I’ll probably see it twice. You realise what happens if Viva Forever is a smash hit? In 50 years they’ll still be singing Say You’ll Be There; their music will be immortal. Am I delirious or just hung over? I can’t believe I just wrote that.

So, you know, Viva Forever indeed.

Yes, of course.

But not when photographs are being taken. When the cameras are around four friends will wrap their arms around each other while the fifth stands slightly off to the side so as to properly execute her pose. God Victoria. You can’t break protocol once, just once?

Anyway, today’s event was held at the St Pancras Hotel where the Wannabe video was shot in 1996. Look how self-conscious Posh is with every single step. I still notice how they put her at the back for the dance sequences because, well, she’s best when she’s not moving. But the weakest singing and dancing Spice was the one who went on. She was 22 then. We have loved her now for 16 years. And she is essentially ...the same.