Trying to decide whether or not I’m feeling Taylor Swift’s stiff feathered bang at the ACM Awards last night. It’s super 80s. And I’m always down for some super 80s steeze. Throw a black bow around that sh-t and suddenly we’re Desperately Seeking Susan. Thing is…I’m not sure Taylor gets it. Has she even seen Desperately Seeking Susan?

I would love to see her in a motorcycle jacket and some ripped up fishnets with biker boots, just to know what that feels like. Instead, a two piece crop is the edgiest we’ll probably get.

We were deprived of the chance to watch Taylor’s jaw drop and make passive aggressive remarks at her ex-boyfriends on stage last night because, as far as I know, she didn’t win during the telecast. Which is too bad because since she’s replaced Selena Gomez with some supermodel friends and Lena Dunham, it might be time for her to deliver one of those barbed speeches about the people who’ve let her down. Or perhaps she’s saving that for song. A song about the breakup for a friendship. We are due.