As I mentioned last month, gossip can’t survive with a little selling out. But here’s the good news – I get to sell out AND be a bitch. So in the spirit of good gossip and great hair, let’s trash Mimi, shall we? Because Mimi might be emancipated but it doesn’t mean she’s immune. And no, I’m not talking about her lazy eye. Or the tanorexia. I am talking about the problematic frizz, a condition called humidity hair - something the Mimi clearly hadn’t anticipated before taking the stage. The problem with humidity hair is not the uncontrollable waves/curls themselves but the fact that any product used to tame it ends up looking greasy and clumped, giving the absolutely CRIMINAL effect of a PERM. And not just any perm…but a MALL perm. And not just any MALL PERM but the kind of MALL PERM you see on girls who date guidos with Camaros and friends named Chuck the Charger and Little Frank. Mimi at the mall??? Look, my girl might be the Hoff with a 7 octave range but she does NOT belong in a mall. I’m thinkin’ Sunsilk Green for Frizz and a new denim doctor wouldn’t hurt either. Someone wanna tell me why this girl hikes her jeans up to her tits? Like, I know low rise ain’t for everyone but seriously…how flattering is this???  To get your own Hairapy or for the sake of smut, please click here and help a sister out. Thank you, love you, owe you.