PEOPLE Magazine’s cover this week is not surprising – obviously the Cambridges and their baby boy king who arrived in time to make the deadline. It’s the only story.

But is it?

Over at US Weekly though, well, the royal child has been bumped in favour of a bachelorette. Never seen this woman in my life. But then again, I don’t watch. I have never watched. So, I guess, a Monarch for a new generation really isn’t the only story.


Because, like, even the Queen had to schlep over to Will and Kate’s cottage to see him. A cottage! And you know, most of the time, they come to her. These are the advantages afforded Her Majesty. So, it would have to be a big ass deal for the Queen to haul her ass over to someone else’s house. Of course he’s a big ass deal. He will wear her crown one day.

Did she have a say in the name? Did she just tell them to get on with it and name him George? King George was the official title of her father, though he was baptised Albert. Albert would work too…although there’s already an Albert in Monaco with all kinds of, um, low classy connotations.