Thursday night to kick off Midnight Madness at TIFF – a screening for Jennifer’s Body starring, as you know, Megan Fox as a high school girl and boy murdering demon written by Diablo Cody.

Starting with Diablo Cody…

I had Diablo Cody fatigue after Juno. If I’m honest though, maybe it wasn’t Diablo Cody fatigue. Maybe it was Diablo Cody envy. Diablo Cody wrote a movie, won an Oscar, writes a tv show, and is continuing to sell her screenplays. She’s only just in her 30s.

Probably envy, right?

But I’ll be petty and say it anyway because it’s true – Jennifer’s Body is not the script that Juno was. Not even close.


Diablo Cody as a short haired bleach blonde kicked my ass.

Poor Bladder Management, this is my new term. I spent a lot of time on Bladder Management. This story for another day. Just know that for some reason I always have to pee when I’m waiting on a red carpet. Always. Doesn’t help when you’re girlcrushing hard. Which is what happened as soon as I saw her. She’s enthusiastic, she has an attitude but she is not cynical, bitchy but not cruel, and so much more attractive now that she’s changed her style.

She also gives a great interview. We were talking about angels and demons – the way society pits girls against each other. Which is, metaphorically I guess, what she was going for in writing the struggle between Megan Fox and Amanda Seyfried in the movie. Kinda like Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston?

Replied Diablo:

Oh don’t bring that poor woman Jennifer Aniston into this! She’s been through SO MUCH!

I snort.

Next – Adam Brody. Who has done nothing since The O.C. apart from breaking up with Rachel Bilson. Which was completely irrelevant to the screaming fans lining the carpet. They screamed louder for him than anyone else. And he loved every minute. Was sweet about it, and humbled, and obliging, but they do miss it. On some level they all get into the business because they crave it. The sucky thing about it is that few of them go on to more beyond the “most popular guy in high school who ends up a loser” road. So it was nice to see that Adam had the opportunity to relive the kind of moment that’s becoming, for him, more and more rare.

Is he cute?

Yes. Very. In that ageless Dick Clark kind of way. Like he’ll look like Seth Cohen forever.

But f-ck Amanda Seyfried is beautiful.

By the way – it’s pronounced SIGH-frid. This is what we were told by a publicist who made a point of pointing it out.

As sweet an actress you will ever meet. Still. So far. In a few years, it could all change. But right now, the simplest way to describe it is that she’s nice. Considerate, smart and thoughtful, she takes her time to actually think about what she wants to say before she says it, shy about attention, almost in disbelief that people want to talk to her, and charmingly endearing when she talks about her boyfriend Dominic Cooper.

I f-cking love her.

And while she may not photograph as well as Megan Fox, in person there is no comparison.

But the camera really does love Megan Fox. When you see her live and up close, I’m telling you, it’s not all that. Dylan was shooting it, Chris was producing it, and all three of us were underwhelmed. Not to say she’s not an attractive person – of course she is. But she’s as attractive as the pretty girl who works as a hostess (but is an aspiring actress of course) at that downtown restaurant chain. You know that girl?

That’s Megan Fox’s face. With a fascinating nose. Couldn’t stop staring at her nose. It’s not very fleshy and seems… carved? I can’t find the right word.

Anyway, working where we do, we see these unfairly beautiful people all the time. Halle Berry is disgusting that way. Same goes for The Jolie. Rachel McAdams is breathtaking. Rachel Weisz is pretty spectacular too. There are many…

And Megan Fox, she doesn’t belong in the same category.

What else physically?

Fox is TINY.

She’s listed at 5 ft 6.


I am 5 ft 3. Slightly taller if I don’t slouch.

She was wearing higher heels and she was shorter than me. I won the tall-off.

As for that business with her thumb and tongue…

Did not see her suck it or stick it out. But she’s definitely very oral. Her fingers are constantly hovering around her lips, not like crackhead Lindsay Lohan and not exactly overtly sexual either… more like a childhood comforting habit, something to do when she’s nervous, uncomfortable, or insecure.

This is the impression you leave with. And this is why my impression of her has changed.

Megan Fox says dumbass things but she’s not dumb. She does stupid sh-t but she’s not stupid. What she is however is insecure. And very, very young.

Hard to remember because she doesn’t look it, right? But Megan Fox is only 23. And you know it as soon as you talk to her. She tries too hard. She speaks in black and white ideology, unshaped by experience, in the broad notions of the power girl slogan, that of a generation taught to demand respect before earning it, and naïve enough to believe that if you say you’re strong you must be strong.

So it may not be conceit or ego at the heart of every Megan Fox stunt. It could actually just be youth. Am quite curious now how she’ll mature in the heat of the spotlight and which way she’ll end up especially since this girl has some fight.

The question was: who’s a better kisser – Shia LaBeouf or Amanda Seyfried.

She wanted to answer it. She had something naughty to say. And then her publicist jumped in – She’s not going to go there. No. Next question.

Ridiculous. She had no problem with me asking about a previous more personal question about what Megan and Brian Austin Green were doing in Toronto.

The best part however is that Megan was annoyed. And couldn’t hide it in front of the camera.

She sneered. And then said on the air that:

Well I guess I can’t answer that because I can’t think for myself.

She’s a rebellious little bitch. I’ll admit, I enjoyed watching that.

Photos attached of Megan Fox, Amanda Seyfried, Adam Brody, and Diablo Cody at the screening on Thursday and the press conference on Friday for Jennifer’s Body.

Photos from and and Entertainment Press/ and