In case you haven’t heard, MGM has given Tom Cruise a new job. A MUCH better job than before, a much more lucrative job than before – with more power and clout and prestige. Tom and Paula Wagner will run United Artists, and while it’s one thing for Paramount to turn down a production deal, it’s another to run a f&cking studio and have your partner call all the shots, which is exactly what the Cruise has scored. The Little Sci photo spread, the deal with Daniel Snyder, Katie’s increasing popularity, her new role as the Face of the Camp Cruise, the Italian wedding, the soccer pitch – the strategy has paid off and I hate to gloat but… well… don’t say I didn’t tell you so. Even when everyone else was writing him off 2 months ago, I posted the following in an article written on September 6th: “…the comeback campaign is gaining momentum. Look already how many people lost their sh*t today over these (Little Sci) photos. And also – what of the specific timing? On the heels of the reconciliation with Brooke Shields, which came on the heels of his new contract with Daniel Snyder, which came on the heels of his embarrassing dismissal from Paramount, which came on the heels of his decreasing popularity – now a family photo op, accessorised by a bouncing, aesthetically pleasing little girl…are you absolutely certain the door is closed on Tom Cruise? As I’ve been saying repeatedly for 2 weeks… I’m not so sure. Everyone is gushing, everyone still cares, the issue will probably sell out, and just to further drive the point home, the MiniVan Majority is beginning to mobilise in support of their embattled hero.” You see the power of the Oprah fan? The vast influence of the People Magazine-reading, amateur gossip terrified by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, terrified by the Jennifer Aniston’s single-not-single-engaged-not-engaged status, terrified by the demise of blonde sunkissed Witherspoon perfection – can you imagine how comforting it is? The sight of a fetching doe-eyed brunette, also a young mother, happy to watch soccer games, happy to be guided by the *Man* in her life, teeth gleaming, mannered, gracious, polite… Niagara Falls wrapped in a bow for the thirsty MiniVan Membership and as such, the unanimous vote: Katie their new heroine, Tom resurrected as her valiant Knight, Second Sci within a year, and an Oscar nomination as a 2 year anniversary gift, produced by United Artists of course. Here are Tom & Katie on Wednesday night at – where else? – Mortons to celebrate their triumphant return. As the Fug Girls would say…well played Tom. Well played. Source