I said to Jacek and Emily last night when Olivia Colman and Hugh Laurie won in their categories that something was rumbling. What came out of the ass of the Hollywood Foreign Press Association was Tom Hiddleston winning Best Actor in a Miniseries over Courtney B Vance in The People Vs OJ Simpson, on his final lap with The Night Manager because, remember, Tom is not nominated for a SAG, as decided by the Screen ACTORS Guild. And his fellow actors might feel extra justified in the decision today after the f-cksh-t he dropped last night in accepting his award.

Tom Hiddleston, at the Golden Globe Awards, told a story about South Sudan, and made it about how awesome he is. To a room full of narcissists who regularly listen to and tell stories about how awesome they are. And it was too f-cking much, EVEN FOR THEM!

I don’t want to hear ever again about how Taylor Swift was the thirsty one in that relationship. EVER AGAIN. I don’t want to hear about how it’s impossible that she would have broken up with him for using her for attention. Don’t come to me with thoughts on how she tricked him into humiliating himself with that tank top. That tank top was MODEST AND SUBTLE compared to what he did last night. Every “oh gosh, me, really?” that Taylor’s ever played at an award show is modest compared to what he did last night. At this point, she’d be doing him a goddamn favour if she got back together with him. At this point, if I were him I’d beg for it. But he might be too thirsty…even for HER.