Sienna Miller covers the new issue of British Vogue.

“On privacy and pregnancy”

YOU? Sienna?

The thing about privacy is that pregnancy is usually exempt. Have you noticed? One after another, celebrities are all like - my personal life is my personal life... BUT I WILL TOTALLY TALK TO YOU UNTIL YOU’RE NAUSEOUS about my doula.  

Great.

Because you can’t criticise a pregnant lady. And mothers are never wrong.

How is it that celebrities are so against the paps but they don’t mind when pap shots of their kids turn up in the magazines? Magazines like PEOPLE. And often. And on mom and baby friendly websites too. After all, those outlets are funding the photographers who take those pictures. If it means that much to you, issue an edict: I will no longer endorse or support or speak to any publication, print and online both, that purchases images of me and my kids.

Of course not.

Pregnancy is a career move. Motherhood is a career move. Children are products.

Which is why someone like Sienna Miller can actually say “privacy” and “pregnancy” in the same sentence and not think she sounds ridiculous. The industry has made it a legitimate practice, an actual job description.

“I'm feeling fine. It's all progressing nicely and it's very exciting. It's nice to start a new decade. I'm in my second trimester, so I'm I-can-talk-about-it pregnant, even though I'm under strict instructions not to say anything as it would completely defeat the point of everything I've tried to achieve in the last eight years.”

Oh but you give yourself away, Sienna. You give yourself away every time. Just like you did at Burger King - click here if that happened before you started visiting this site.

What exactly does “under strict instructions” mean? It means that it’s not in Sienna’s nature to NOT go there. She always goes there. Sienna can never help herself. Sienna is Sienna’s favourite subject. Sienna Drama is Sienna’s favourite way of life. Spotlight On Sienna is Sienna’s preferred position.

And here she is on the cover of a fashion magazine.

She is beautiful. There’s really no discernible difference though, at least not in Vogue, between a non-pregnant Sienna and a pregnant one.

But the new shots of her with Tom Sturridge in New York yesterday are more telling. And look Sarah! He shaved!

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