A proud moment last night: my husband was cussing his balls off at NHL09 when inspiration struck.

Him: I don’t care who she is. She could be the most beautiful woman in the world. #1 on my Freebie 5. But if she gets implants she is dead to me. A dealbreaker.

Me: what if I get implants?

Him: divorce

Me: So can I get a breast reduction?

Him: don’t take the Lord’s name in vain.

Then he went back to schooling some 14 year old online.

And here’s Tori Spelling, enjoying Memorial Day in Palm Springs with her kids and that goldigger who married her, showing off her deformed f-cking tits.

KFed Junior can keep a straight face and stop himself from vomiting when he declares to the world, repeatedly, that she’s the most beautiful woman in the world. Amazing, non?

Photos from CHRIS/GVK/Bauergriffinonline.com