As I have said many, many, many times before, familiar to those of you who’ve been hitting this site for a while (thank you!), Gossip is a Buffet. You can choose to believe that Jennifer Aniston really is the girl next door...who lives in Malibu. Or you can choose to believe that her entire life is engineered and manufactured right down to her highlights. Especially her highlights. Some can only see the spin side. Some live to break the spin side. So you choose your own entree. And if you’re a Twi-Hard, I promise, the entree below will not be on your menu. You may as well stop reading now. Unless of course you’re the rare Twilight fan capable of deductive reasoning.

Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and Taylor Lautner were back in Vancouver last week to work on Eclipse reshoots. Or “pick-ups”. They called it “pick-ups”. Because pick-ups are for small tech fixes and have nothing to do with actual content or new scenes. Which is why Stephenie Meyer, the author, was in town too. In a few short months, Meyer has suddenly become a movie lighting expert...what? No, no, she just thought it’d be a good idea to hop on a plane, fly a few hours and spend some time in Canada hanging out with the crew for sh-ts and giggles. Of course there was no scene doctoring required. None at all. Sh-ts and giggles only.

And of course there was very little reshooting to be done. So little that the crew wasn’t actually required to be on set for 16, 15, and 16 hour days for 3 straight days. They only stayed on set for fun. Away from their families, away from leisure time, all in service of fun. If anyone stayed on set for 16, 15, and 16 hours it was only because there was so much fun happening. No work, just fun. On a film set. Oh and there was totally no overtime penalty on the final day either. Overtime? For what? People were just sitting around like not working.

What could there possibly be to work on?

Something in the meadow? What? F-ck no. They only stored their gear in the meadow on Wednesday – photos attached – and storing gear in the meadow doesn’t mean shooting in the meadow. It’s just that some people have a lot of extra money lying around and wanted to rent some trucks and secure a permit for the meadow and store their sh-t in the meadow but not actually do any work in the meadow. For sh-ts and giggles.

Besides, how could they shoot in the meadow? Robert Pattinson hadn’t arrived yet. Pattinson arrived late afternoon on Wednesday. Were they expecting him the day before? Of course not. They were totally not expecting him on Tuesday. And when he didn’t show on Tuesday, they were totally not hoping he’d come in early on Wednesday either. His bodyguard was totally not spotted at the airport gas station on Wednesday hoping Pattinson would be on the early flight in from London (Wednesday noon arrival) so that they could take him directly to the meadow set. Nah. Like I said, they just booked the meadow for sh-ts and giggles and equipment storage. That’s all.

But... just for sh-ts and giggles, what if he was supposed to come in on Tuesday? And didn’t. And came in too late on Wednesday instead? Would he have missed the opportunity to shoot in the meadow? The permit for the meadow was for one day only. And they were unable to secure a permit for any other day. Which would require some improvisation. Shooting some other footage in the meadow instead. And a scene at the dock between Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner. These photos of the dock were taken around 3pm over a period of 45 minutes in the afternoon Wednesday during a break from shooting. At this point they’d already been working for almost 9 hours. In some of these images, Stewart is getting her makeup done, and the director David Slade is setting up the shot.

But that’s only for sh-ts and giggles. The safe, likely studio approved interpretation of these events, which OF COURSE is the ONLY believable interpretation, is that Pattinson arrived when he was supposed to, and was not expected in the meadow ever, and that the meadow was only used as a storage facility/parking lot, because that’s what, in Twilight land, meadows are for, period the end, no drama, proceed.

As for how everyone was getting on... well everyone got on great. Of course David Slade wasn’t upset with Pattinson for arriving late. Pattinson arrived when he was supposed to. They totally weren’t trying to book the meadow again on Friday but were declined because of another production (Stargate) had it booked already. And there was no closed door meeting between Pattinson, Slade, and Twilight producers on Thursday. Nope. Never happened. And since it never happened, Pattinson never stormed off either. In fact, Pattinson arrived on Wednesday late afternoon but didn’t end up shooting a second until Friday because he also wanted to come in early and sh-t and giggle with Stephenie Meyer and the crew. Pattinson has a wonderful relationship with David Slade. They were like tight ass besties during principal photography last year. Slade thinks Pattinson has the skill of Marlon Brando. And Pattinson knows that Slade thinks he’s Marlon Brando. So there’d be no f-cking way these two would be throwing down.

It was 3 days of pure bliss in Vancouver. Hugs all around and everything went smoothly and they didn’t even have to try that hard because trying would imply that something needed fixing and nothing needing fixing because everything was so perfect and happy. So please, Twi-Hards, do not stress. There’s nothing to stress about. Will Eclipse be great? Does it matter? Twilight fans, in their support of the first two films, have already demonstrated that quality isn’t a basic minimum requirement for their enjoyment. You will love this movie.

Exclusive photos from PUNKD Images