Check out the new cover of Us Weekly.

This is the first front on, clear shot of Swifty and Jakey together since they’ve been together, held back by the photo agency for maximum value... and it looks like the right move too – a cover photo can command upwards of $25K, if it’s the right one.

And this one leaves no doubt.

The couple you can’t stand...

That you keep complaining about...

That has made you love him less...

But why??? When there’s so much to talk about?!? Like how her hawkeye of a mother feels about what Swifty and Jakey do after the lights go out. And John Mayer has been awfully, awfully glum looking in NYC these days. Doesn’t this make you happy?

Oh fine, go on. I can’t stop you from bitching about it.