Vanessa Hudgens seemed to be more into her wardrobe than the music this weekend at Coachella though I suppose she’s not the only one who priorities the clothes over the artists. I mean, they kinda all do. And, well, if the Hoff is showing up at Coachella now, what does that say about Coachella? That question for another time.

Today’s question about Coachella is about portable toilets. I spend a lot of time thinking about toilets. When you have a small bladder, you need to be prepared. My spot on the route for the Royal Wedding is on the Duke of York steps. In terms of facilities, this is actually the worst position because, well, there’s none around. And our live show goes on for 7 hours. I will be dehydrated that day. But I’ve been asking myself, if there were portable toilets around, would I use them? Generally I refuse to. Which makes events like Coachella not really part of the program.

But do the Vanessa Hudgens and the Kate Bosworths and the celebrities who hit up Coachella, do they have to use the same portables as the public? Or is there a special celebrity pee area set up for that purpose? I would totally crash the celebrity pee area.

On second thought…

Maybe I wouldn’t. They stick their fingers down their throats a lot. And get sick from drinking on empty stomachs. Their portables might actually be worse. By the way, here’s a tip: you never, EVER want to go into a washroom, portable or otherwise, after Ebola Paris Hilton’s done with it. That sh-t is an animal.

As for Hudgens’s date, last year she was there with Zac Efron. This year her boyfriend is Josh Hutcherson, the new Peeta. Jesus. I mean, they are going to have to do some serious, serious work on making this guy a heartthrob because, well, see for yourself. The headband, the shorts, the shoes, NONE of it is working for me.

Photos from Winning/