Chill. I know that’s not the official term. But I only have so much room in my titles and “the wife of the Prime Minister” is a f-cking mouthful so can you not be such a tightass this one time and just deal? Because otherwise you won’t fully enjoy the amazingness of these pictures.

I saw them yesterday at the British Fashion Awards but haven’t had a chance to write it til now.

So there’s Victoria Beckham, as usual, hard-posing her ass off ... which is clearly more important than standing like a normal person next to the Samantha Cameron, wife of British Prime Minister David Cameron.

Look at her. With her leg out like that. So that Mrs Cameron – who is obviously not a professional poser – has no choice but to stand awkwardly beside her, like two mannequins haphazardly thrown together. I’m really into how uncomfortable Mrs Cameron looks. I can almost hear her...

Errrrr....

You’d think for once in her life, Posh could be considerate of more than just the look of her dress? That she could maybe put her arm around the lady? Take a picture not like a jutting hip model but like a properly socialised human being?

Not her.

She’s crazy. And insecure. This time she probably took one look at how tall Mrs Cameron is and decided to out-thin and out-glamour her on the spot. You know.

And then when it came time for a handshake...

She’s POSING WHILE SHE’S HANDSHAKING!!!

Like...

It’s the Prime Minister’s WIFE!!! Who is being gracious and open with her body language, and Victoria is only showing her half a shoulder!!! And she’s still thinking about how she’ll look in photographs!!!

There are too many exclamation points!!! But I can’t help it!!!

It’s too good. She’s too f-cking Try.


Photos from Nick Harvey/Wireimage