Celebrity Social Media, April 23, 2019

Someone threw a lemon at Ariana while she was onstage at Coachella, which is insane! Do you know what this woman has been through? The fact that she can still perform is amazing so whoever paid money to go to Coachella to throw a lemon at her needs some karmic retribution, like getting a tiny papercut that really hurts and then getting lemon juice in it. 

Chrissy Teigen’s cooking advice is so valuable because she actually cares how things taste, not just how they look. She made this absolute unit of a beef wellington and by her standards, it sucked. It looks really good, but it didn’t taste good and that I can appreciate. 

Colin Jost was at the Avengers Avenging the Avenged premiere with Scarlett Johansson and I wonder how he feels about his Weekend Update partner, Michael Che, defaming a reporter to defend his honour. It happened over a long weekend so it hasn’t gotten that much play (also, Che isn’t very famous) but here’s the gist: a reporter published an article asking why everyone “hates Colin Jost.” Che took great offense on behalf of his co-worker, so he took to social media to repeatedly infer that the reporter engages in bestiality. True to SNL’s Weekend Update format, the bit was not the least bit funny or entertaining. But if I’m Colin Jost and I’m dating a mega movie star and things are going well, the last thing I want is someone to take up my cause this way. Che is a petulant idiot, and by acting out on behalf of Jost, he’s making Jost look like he approves of these kind of thin-skinned, man-baby tactics. Also, because of Che, the original article on Jost probably got a lot more traction than it would have otherwise. But it seems like these two are so perfect for one another because they actually like this kind of attention. If SNL’s Weekend Update was as consistently funny as Pajiba, maybe Colin and Michael would be a little less defensive. 

I’m not spending the day with "Old Town Road" stuck in my head all by myself.