Celebrity Social Media, July 5, 2019

By now you’ve probably seen this… but just in case you haven’t – Gwyneth Paltrow had no idea she was in Spider-Man: Homecoming. And she also doesn’t know Sebastian Stan. This dates back to the Avengers: Infinity War premiere when Chris Pratt had to tell her who Sebastian was and who he played in the movies. He explains it to her the way you try to explain TV shows to your parents. 

And just like your parents, G can’t keep up because according to Sebastian, he had to remember himself again for her at Valentino. What will her response be when someone eventually asks her about this? She’s too busy importing dust from Saturn to sell into your vagina for your spiritual wellness to care about who’s who in Hollywood, you know? 

I’m pretty sure I’ve watched every single episode of Seinfeld but I don’t have a Seinfeld memory like so many other people. Like, I can’t easily pull a Seinfeld quote off the top of my head (aside from the most obvious ones, “master of your domain” etc). Which is why I completely forgot, or I never committed it to memory in the first place, that Seinfeld premiered in the summer? Today is the 30th anniversary. 

Lil Nas X has been famous for less than a year. So he doesn’t yet know how to wrap up an interview on live television. 

I do like that Nas has given people reason to revive this infamous live television moment though because that little girl will be my hero forever. 

As for the presenter who tried to prevent Nas from walking out of the shot, she could have used a pointer from a peer: 

How did the Beckhams celebrate their 20th anniversary? As if they’d keep it a secret. Not when the opportunity is this exclusive: a private tour of Versailles. Victoria wore white and red, fittingly. And David included so many shots of her, just her, in his carousel. Everything is fine, everything is fine. 

 

 

Jennifer Aniston isn’t on social media but her friends are, so they do the updating for her. Jen spent the Fourth with her girls – Courteney Cox, Jennifer Meyer, Amanda Anka, Laura Dern…and Suzanne Somers?! Random. 

Meanwhile, Alex Rodriguez took the responsibility of sharing Fourth of July well-wishes on behalf of Jennifer Lopez and their children while her Fourth of July post was about how awesome he is. 

 

Mindy Kaling’s date for the Fourth was her watermelon pool float and whoever was taking the video. BJ Novak? I will probably never live in a house with a pool. But I really, really want a pool float. If I could pick my own pool float it would be in the shape of sushi. 

I am still so disappointed over how dirty they did Cersei Lannister. She deserved better than to spend her last days looking out the window with dialogue that was beneath her. Lena Headey is trying to make up for it by fangirling the one woman Cersei would stan: Michelle Yeoh. 

Maria will return to this space on Monday as she wraps up her holiday this weekend. And she’s missed a lot that matters to her: Breaking Bad, the Beckham anniversary, and now a Gallagher situation. I wonder if she’ll ever go away again.