Hi Duana,
Long time reader, first time… caller? Does that work in the digital age? Regardless, I would love your help.
Here’s the scoop: with baby #1 I didn’t need to write to you because the baby-naming conversation with my husband took us literally 30 seconds. We didn’t know what we were having, but even so we had a first and middle name picked out for either, with a backup name just in case. We were set. Anastasia was born, and her name fits her perfectly. We call her “Ana” more often than I care to admit, but even so it still works.
Now we’re expecting baby girl #2 in early fall. Our backup name the first time around was Alexandra, but now, almost 5 years later, it just doesn’t seem quite right… I mean, Anastasia and Alexandra are BIG names – I’ll never be able to get away with one pack of alphabet stickers because there are never going to be enough vowels! A minor concern to be sure, but you get what I mean. It also needs to flow with our French surname ending with -ier, which again has several vowels.
That said, I do love a name full of vowels and am particularly drawn to the “A” names. I also tend to love older European names, nothing “modern,” and uncommon spellings drive me batty. Some of the names we’ve tossed around include: Juliette, Simone, Evangeline, Aurelia, and Elizabeth. My husband’s contribution has been to nix Simone as “too artificial” … because apparently he saw that movie the one time??? And to add Aurora to the list, to which I responded that we probably didn’t need to have both daughters share the names of Disney Princesses. Oh, and he briefly asked if Aurelia was because I watch a lot of Love Actually every December. That’s not why I like it, but really, would that be bad?!?
No-go names: Charlotte and Isabelle/Isabella (just don’t like them), and Catherine and Natasha (family names, which are of a similar vein to our list above).
I would love some advice and maybe a hidden treasure of a name that we haven’t thought of yet? I can’t get over how much harder it seems this time around when we don’t have the one perfect name right from the get-go. Any and all help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!!!
Wait, what movie did he see?! I’m drawing a blank, one I’ll probably kick myself about as soon as I publish this letter. But as a matter of fact, we were discussing the name ‘Simone’ a few weeks ago, and (in addition to everyone agreeing it’s incredible, and a rarely-used gem) my big revelation was that the only pop-culture Simone I remember was from Head Of The Class, which certain people (Kathleen, obviously) were too young to have seen… so what’s the reference I’m missing?
Regardless, I don’t think that name would help you, because while Simone is sleek and beautiful and sophisticated, what you want is a lot of syllables. And believe me, believe me, I want that too! I love Anastasia, and I understand why Alexandra and Aurora and Aurelia are suggesting themselves because they seem as substantial, as worthy of a coronation – and in isolation, they are. I can fully understand why a family would consider any of them alongside Anastasia (even if I not-so-secretly think you chose the best one).
But giving your daughter a long and regal-ish name that begins and ends in A, when her older sister already has a long and regal-ish name that begins and ends in A… I know it’s just about preference, but it winds up seeming like you’re trying to have a matched set, you know?
My advice is for you to go with an equally ‘big’ name, just from a different part of the spectrum… or alphabet, for that matter… so that you don’t feel hamstrung by similar sounds, accidentally calling one by the other’s name, or the lack of vowel distribution in sticker packs. (Honestly, the things that people think of!) There are names that wouldn’t necessarily sound alike, but I think the thing is they might feel… lesser, in comparison; Adele or Averil (who would obviously only be called Avril) or Amabella are gorgeous choices, but there’s another entire alphabet out there.
I really like where you’re going with Evangeline and Juliette, because, like Anastasia, they’re the less commonly chosen long romantic names – and I’d encourage you to stay on that tip. For example, if there was ever a time for Veronica, this is it. Four syllables, just like her sister, equally as romantic and as powerful – but it’s a name that’s very much her own. But I recognize that for some people there’s something too Archie/Riverdale or too Catholic about it, though I’ll never understand it, so what about Valeria, or Valentina? I’ve written before about a toddler Valentina I knew whose nickname was ‘Valle’, like Valet, and I love it and want it to have another day. Anastasia and Valentina could still be fairy tale princesses, just not ones whose stories we know …which makes them that much more exciting, right?
You could go with Wilhelmina, which I’ll never stop suggesting because I love it so much, or with Evangelina rather than Evangeline for that extra punch at the end – or Genevieve, or Marguerite, or Guinevere – but I suspect that what you’re actually craving is a little bit of an exclamation point on the end of the name, and I’m here to tell you in so many words: go get it! Have that fourth syllable, go for the name that seems a bit extra! I promise you’re not going to regret it!
This is where we really get to play, you know? Francesca, or Luciana, or Magdalena? (Actually Magdalena and Anastasia are so homonym-y I might like that combo better than Veronica!) Seraphina, or Paloma or Isadora – they’re all in line with the names you’ve suggested, or the ones that are no-go because someone else in the family wears them, but they’re also so singular she’ll get to make them entirely her own, just like Anastasia has.
Seraphina? Jessamine? Jacinta? Tatiana, even? I’m not trying to push, but you know who can’t choose Tatiana? Bryn’s parents. Molly’s parents. You, on the other hand, all these names are open to you!
I feel like people with your particular set of name predilections often find themselves sorted out by Josephine, if that’s appealing, or you could go with Celestine or Theodora or Stefania or Viviana. There are so many gorgeous names waving their hands in the air begging to be chosen! Millicent? Georgina, Raphaella, Felicity, Savannah, Bianca? I’m really on a vowel tip here, so I’m feeling these long and vowel-heavy endings – but you could even flirt with Gabrielle or Isadora or Cordelia? I wonder if you think they’re too consonant-heavy, but I would argue that’s actually the beauty of the division between them – like two sisters agreeing they’ll each shoulder separate parts of the alphabet, you know?
I’m very excited by the possibilities, and more than a little envious – and though I said what I said about staying away from names that begin and end in A, I know there are people who read the column looking for a first inspiration (or a fifth) and for whom my admonitions about all the As don’t apply. For them (and a little bit for you) my final name to roll around in your brain is Araminta, entirely inspired by this, the best name story on the internet this week:
Read this and marvel, and see if there isn’t something that sways you some kind of way in there too – I will never grow tired of hearing all the ways that our names make us who we are, and I can’t wait to find out who your daughter becomes. Let us know!
