Hi Duana,
My cousin told me she reached out to you when naming her daughter and that you were very helpful. I'd love to hear your thoughts and advice on our situation if you care to read it:)
My husband and I are expecting a baby girl and are getting nowhere fast with naming her. I am a very decisive person normally, and my husband is the opposite. When naming our son, I knew what I wanted and my husband was all over the place. It drove me crazy but eventually he came around to my pick and we named our son Tate Sydney Mc***ish. With our first kid, we (ok, pretty much me), came up with both girls names and boys names for either outcome. We had both agreed (miraculously) that if it was a girl she would be either Georgia, or Poppy. That was 2+ years ago, and now, with a rise in popularity for both names, I am less drawn to them, although I do still love them. I know 2 baby Georgias and 4 baby Poppys, and having an uncommon name is important to me. My husband does not know any Georgias or Poppys and still really wants one of those names. My next choice down the list would be Phoebe. My husband is reminded of Phoebe Buffay from Friends and the woman named 'Fibi' (pronounced Phoebe) that he works with, so he's not a fan. Are there some fantastic selling points for my husband you can make about why Phoebe would be an excellent choice? Next on my list would be Plum. This doesn't seem to fit with any middle names. It does however make a beautiful middle name and goes very well with many of my other choices. Bianca, Scarlet, Heidi, Lyla. Bianca Plum sounds quite delicious, but Plum Bianca does not sound as good. I'm concerned that Bianca may feel like a bit of a mouthful. Some others on my list that I like but just don't think are the ones, are: Gracie, Lark, Violet, Pepper, Margot.
Thank you in advance!
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So, I should first say that I think you did a great job in naming your son, not only in terms of names individually but in terms of the rhythm of the name – if readers will indulge me, this letter gives me a chance to pull out some of my old standards, ‘rule’-wise (with the first and most important being that loving a name comes first and foremost).
But another is that great names are often varied in their syllables, so “Tate Sydney Mc****ish” is full and surprising because it goes from one to two to three syllables, and while you don’t have to have that be the case for your daughter’s name, it can be helpful to keep in mind.
First of all, you need to ask yourself whether knowing other Poppys and Georgias is going to bother you – or your husband when he clues in that he knows some himself. I would caution you too, depending on where you live, that you may find the same premise applies to Lyla and Scarlet; both are, in varying degrees, extremely popular in pockets – Scarlets have tended to be somewhere between 8 and 12 these days, where Lylas are less popular, but for some people have been presented as a viable alternative to the immense popularity of Ella and Lola. Just so you’re informed, since everything that has a flower reference/angle tends to pile onto one another, Lilly to Calla to Lola to Evelyn, you get the idea.
Now, onto the next issue – how to make Phoebe palatable. For some people this is as easy as pointing out that she’s Holden Caulfield’s sister in Catcher In The Rye. For others that’s not a plus at all – but Phoebe absolutely is. So, your method is this: if you love Chloe or Naomi, or if he does, remind him that Phoebe is the more rare option, and charming. If that’s not the thing, you can tell him that Phoebe Buffay and Friends are part of a huge popularity revival and that you can get out ahead of the trend before all today’s teenagers start to name their kids Phoebe in a decade... but if none of that works, I might start floating Daphne or Persephone instead, or go a completely other way with a Greek name, something like Althea or Ariadne.
I am biased, but I love Bianca. I don’t agree it’s a mouthful, though I would go short in the middle if you chose it – Bianca Plum Mc***ish or Bianca Jane or Bianca Faith… and I think it’s never going to get too popular and feel like it’s run of the mill. In much the same vein as Margot and Heidi (and actually, Plum and Lark and Pepper), you might like something short and kicky like Luna or Keelin or Mona or Sive or Anya or Kiva – those compact and impactful names that don’t feel like they’re veering into a less wearable all-nickname situation, like Pepper or (yeah, maybe) Plum. But trust your instincts, because you did well once before…
Let us know!
