You know the one awards show custom I totally don’t get? Changing into a totally different look for the after party – or parties. 

I mean, I do get it, of course: why limit yourself to one outfit if you could choose two? I would have so much fun if I didn’t have to make one ultimate choice for every occasion where I’m putting together a significant ‘outfit’. But it seems to be a 50/50 split of people who change vs. people who stick to one look (though I do like that more men are changing these days too!). There’s no discernable rule about when to do it, unless I’m missing something? 

If I had to guess, maybe if you’re nominated and you don’t win, you change to distinguish your ‘nominee’ self from your regular party-going self, whereas if you win, you want to remain as that winning person all night, for maximum recognition/photos where you have a drink in one hand and a statuette in the other? 

Actually, now that I’m thinking about it, I think what I don’t like about the custom for women is that you can have two totally different looks, but it’s a lot more difficult to do two totally different hairstyles. I guess if you left your hair loose for the show, you could pin it up afterward without too much trouble, but the vast majority of people don’t bother to go the other way, because it’s got such potential for disaster. 

Case in point – Florence Pugh. Her teal Louis Vuitton gown was not my favourite, but while I didn’t love the look, I LOVED how much she committed to the whole ‘prom queen’ aesthetic: dyed-to-match shoes, the belt, the delicate accessories and pearly pink nails – I am a real sucker for leaning all the way in to a given look, and though I wouldn’t have favoured a ‘Saved By The Bell At The Oscars’ look myself, I love that she didn’t pull a single punch. 


Then, at Vanity Fair, she goes for a much sleeker, more sophisticated metallic column that, frankly, I covet. Those Art Deco details on the skirt are spectacular and the bodice has a somewhat new take on the ombré thing – a perfect party dress. 


But – the same hair! The same look! I think the earrings are technically different, but she could have gone with something big and glossy, shaken out her hair, a massive necklace for the massive neckline – something, right? This dress feels like it was so excited to go out to the party, but in retrospect is SO jealous of the amount of effort that Teal Ruffles got. “Florence always loved her more than me!” 

This is where we are in the no-sleep delirium. I’m anthropomorphizing party dresses and creating narratives between them. It’s fine. I’m fine. 

Anyway, pour one out for our girl Art Deco Column -- but not for Florence herself, because she had something unreal going on last night. Every word I can think of seems overdone and fluffy – ‘luminous’, ‘effervescent’, ‘sparkly’. Why does every word I want to use sound like an ad for ginger ale? 

She just seemed to draw every eye toward her, in a totally different way than, like, Billie Eilish. Maybe it’s because she’s young (Lainey saw her offering up her driver’s licence to verify her identity with the clipboard types on the red carpet, but when I heard the story I initially thought it was of the ‘proving she’s old enough to drink’ variety), but she’s clearly a woman – and she doesn’t seem to be an over-the-top outgoing type like, say, Jennifer Lawrence, who always seemed like the centre of a party tornado. 

Why is someone who seems self-possessed so confounding? Why can’t I just say ‘Florence Pugh. Seems chill.’ Why am I excited to see her in Black Widow all of a sudden?