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What did you make of Jake and Heath"s weird performance at the SAG awards? Has Heath never read from a teleprompter before? And what was up with all the giggling? Dear Lynn, I honestly have no idea. I was more fixated on why Heath insisted on hitching his hand up on his waist, like a nagging hen housewife without her showercap. It was like watching two school boys trying to recite a poem, attempting to look cool but failing miserably in front of their teammates on the football team. I much prefer the memory of them in the tent, dark shadows, laboured breathing, the kind of grunts that only one activity can produce. There. Pleasant thoughts are restored.

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