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Dear Gossips,

Last night I sabred my first bottle of champagne. Jacek was standing by with cell phone in hand ready to call the paramedics. I am ordinarily a clumsy motherf-cker and some people jack it on their maiden voyages. But this, a sabre and a champagne bottle in my hands, this is my gift. Like I was born for it. Now all I want to do is run around slicing open bottles. If you haven’t, you must try it. Or invite me over to do it for you.

My parents don’t keep alcohol in the house. Our Christmas was dry. For five days, not a drop. You can imagine.

Holiday movies pick – for many people it was Avatar. Avatar is a huge giant massive success. Avatar has now grossed over $600 million worldwide and continues to earn overwhelmingly solid reviews. Thing is, at least at the theatres I was at, it was only playing on one screen, not surprising since there are so many new releases. And still Avatar is bringing those numbers.

We chose Sherlock Holmes instead. Because RDJ is the SH-T. An official review to follow later. Just know – here’s an actor who saved his life and talent, even though just 6 years ago no one would insure him, and is now at 45 a personal and professional winner…while Charlie Sheen, curiously born the same year, appears to be travelling the opposite trajectory.

Gawker said it best: Sheen is a f-ck up, and the women he marries are f-ck ups. And it’s a cycle of f-cking each other up that never f-cking ends.

Monday – this blogging is champagne-fumed. Please indulge the typos? Am online all day.

Yours in gossip,

Lainey

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