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Finally had the chance last night to read James Franco's short story published in Esquire and any vestiges of Freebie Five-ness that I'd been clinging to for him were officially killed. Because He. Is. So. TRY.

James Franco is the celebrity Try writing equivalent to Victoria Beckham Try in style.

And his Try is so Fontrum.

Don’t care that he’s enrolled in Yale’s English PhD program. Don’t care.

There was some charm to his soap opera General Hospital endeavour. He was cute on 30 Rock. He did a good job on SNL. But this...this... this short story is pretension on paper. It’s a hybrid wannabe of Dave Eggers and James Frey and that guy, as noted in Salon, who wore black all the time in first year and quoted from Nietzsche. Even the f-cking title is pretentious:

Just Before the Black

And lines like these:

My window is cracked, just a bit, and the air plays on my forehead like a cold whisper.

You are cringing. I know. I am cringing too. Make it stop. Oh but it doesn’t stop. It goes on for an eternity, the nonsense keeps coming, and there is MORE. He’s publishing a collection of short stories called Palo Alto in the fall. An entire volume of his Try.

F-ck. WHY? It’s INDEFENSIBLE. And it’s over. It’s over. It’s totally over.

Read the full short story here. If you can stand it.

Photos attached of James Franco arriving in Berlin for the Berlin Film Festival last month.


Photos from Flynetonline.com

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