Jonathan Majors’s publicist and legal team probably don’t want me to be calling this video a short film. But life is art, and in our times we live our lives on screen. Sure, there’s a possibility that this was indeed an unscripted, totally spontaneous event but the point of this post is that there are a LOT of people who don’t think it was unscripted or spontaneous, and that speaks to Jonathan’s credibility right now. 


Yesterday, TMZ dropped an exclusive - two high school students got into a fight on Monday and here comes Jonathan Majors, who rushed out of his burger time at In-N-Out, to break it up and reestablish peace. He might be Marvel’s new big bad, but in real life, Jonathan Majors is a true superhero, swooping in to set the kids straight, reminding them to lead with love, just as he does. 


Jonathan, as you know, is awaiting trial on domestic violence charges. A hearing to set the court date is supposed to take place today! Today! What a coincidence! Just hours after a video of him stepping in to cure school violence goes viral?! 

I mean, sure, again, it’s totally plausible that this is actually how it went down for real, that Jonathan was in the area, and TMZ was in the area, and the stars aligned for him to save these children from themselves while the cameras were rolling. After all, everyone has a camera these days. 

That the footage ended up on TMZ, though, and not on Snap or TikTok? I’m not the only one who finds that curious. 


High schoolers don’t go to websites anymore. It’s depressing and I take it personally since we have our own website here but it’s the truth. They’re also all about immediate gratification. If this went down on Monday and it wasn’t out into the world in real time or five minutes later? Does that even count?!

The people have doubts. And the doubting people are meme-ing. Michael Jackson is coming up a lot. 


And so is Jussie Smollett. 

This is the one that sent me…


Others, like Sarah, are pointing out how perfectly Jonathan steps into frame. You know, for a live and unpredictable event, the camera just happened to be in the perfect position to get him entering the scene. It’s a collision of convenient coincidences! Almost like even the universe is onside with Jonathan and invested in his innocence!

And we haven’t even gotten to the person with the laptop yet. The laptop cut is the new Snyder cut! 


Discussion thread live for this post on The Squawk.