I hesitated on that title. But I couldn’t think of another way to describe what Katie Holmes is doing in this outfit.

You know when you try to get away with something?  When you know what you’ve worked on isn’t exactly the answer to the question, but you try to wiggle it around to being it anyway? When you MacGyver a solution to a problem and it’s not quite perfect, but it’s… well, you hope nobody looks too closely?

I feel like this is what Katie Holmes has done here. She’s fudged this outfit into being right for her to choose because… I guess because she had it, and she’s friends with Zac Posen? It’s utterly wrong for it, of course, even though it has the dark murky green colour, it has nothing to do with anything Kawakubo or Garçons, and no amount of green eyeshadow will convince me otherwise.

Which would not bother me if she just made a bad choice—but I think Katie Holmes knows better. Knows this was a really off look for her but tried to maintain that she did it on purpose, you know? She’s worked in fashion. She knows a couple of things. But she pushed forward, fudging that with the right hair and accessories and makeup, it would kind of be on theme. But it wasn’t, and she knew, I think, as soon as she got there.

In fact, when I see that she’s posting things like this, I think she’s deliberately trying to counteract the stiff, BAFTAS-or-Kennedy Centre Honours vibe her dress has:


I so admire this incredibly talented lady ❤️ this is us obviously showing off our cleavage :) @zacposen

A post shared by Katie Holmes (@katieholmes212) on

Name two people less likely to be together in an Instagram pic. I’ll wait… 

But you liked the picture, and we like Katie Holmes. I always think, just one more year away from all that weirdness of 2005 and beyond, and she’ll loosen up. But I don’t know if that day is coming. That bun is pretty tightly wound back there.