I guess I’m too old…or not old enough? Because I thought “forking” was a euphemism for something else. But it’s actually a facial treatment using forks. And Madonna is doing it. There are some other details here about her daily beauty routine, which sounds exhausting – and I say this not because I would never consider it, because I will consider ALL OF IT as soon as I think I need it, but because I get up as soon as my alarm goes off. And every 5 minutes is accounted for with sh-t to do. There is a lot of time in Madonna’s morning spent on pulling things out the freezer and out of packages to put on your face. Which, again, I AM PREPARED TO DO when the time comes. But f-ck, how much earlier do I have to wake up? (Dlisted) 

Here’s what I don’t understand about Meghan Markle’s shady relatives – when they keep talking to tabloids and doing interviews, doesn’t it reinforce how shady they are? Sorry. That was naïve. Because of course, given Meghan’s background, and the fact that she’s not properly British, and by properly British I mean white British and born (which science has determined this week wasn’t original British), probably people like OfMichael of Kent will be all like, see? See the impurity? Please. Like aristocrats can’t be trash. (Cele|bitchy)

This is a great dress on Taraji. She looks amazing in this dress, non? Am also really into this hairstyle but I think that’s because I’ve been looking for a wig that is this exact length. Yes. I said I’m looking for a wig. Because I don’t want to cut my hair but sometimes I want to play around with a shorter hairstyle and now you’re judging me for wanting a wig. Is it wrong to want a wig? Tell me. If it’s wrong I need to know and be corrected. Thank you in advance. (Go Fug Yourself) 
What will Prince William and Catherine call their third child? Pretty sure it’s not going to be Stormi. Or one of the bonkers names Duana comes up with now and again. People are saying for sure it’ll be names Victoria or James or Alexander or Mary. How about Jane? Would a Jane work? How far outside Mary and Jane and James and Victoria can we get? Is Stella too far? Is Colin? Is Elaine? (Pop Sugar) 

Oprah. For President? I don’t know if we’ve gotten a straight answer, like a definitive answer, until now. And look who got it out of her. Well if it isn’t the creative genius that is Lin-Manuel Miranda. What can’t he do?! (TMZ) 

Are you ready for the Olympics? I am normally an Olympics junkie and, of course, the event I can’t miss during the Winter Olympics is figure skating. A longtime reader called Ritchie sent over this piece about women’s figure skating yesterday and what it can do to a young athlete’s body. All of this just makes me miss Michelle Kwan even more. (The New York Times)